Dirckman wrote:

I'm 32, haven't reproduced and don't ever plan on it....  Life has it's kicks for sure, but it's purposeless and has no external meaning....  People desperately try to bring a purpose or meaning to their reality by spewing out babies, believing in a higher power, or espousing themselves to some moral or political authority...  I won't spew out babies because the financial burden would immediately put a damper on my hedonistic pursuits...  I won't believe in a higher power because it's completely baseless and there is nothing out there that can't be explained through naturalistic processes....  I won't espouse myself to any moral or political authority because that would immediately be handing over my ability to act and think as an individual to someone else....  All there is left for me is individualistic philosophy, the right of the individual to choose their own life, beliefs and morals as they choose whether they succeed or fail....  I've made my life choices which are almost certain to grant me a very short life because of the risks that they hold...  I'm a single white male without children which means my taxes are higher than most, there are no social programs set up to help out my kind, I'm blamed for the ills of the world and I'm soon to be a minority....  I think it's time we ignored octomom and let the fucking bitch rot for her life choices...  I could give a rat's ass about her kids too, they're almost certain to end up as fucked up as their mom...

I agree with every word in there aside of the being a single white male part.  Because, well, I'm a single white female.

Btw, where's my honey??

scarydog wrote:

Frankly, I expect a Soylent Green world in the future---squalor, crime, stifling pollution, pampered elites oblivious to lower-class misery

Or an Edwardian London type of future...

The Incredible Stretch Womb


she needs a spandex costume for this, something like this:



mixed with this:

Litterwoman

The Natalinator 9000

Princess Pedigree Polluter

Octoslag, Queen of the Vaginal Abyss

Lady Octoskank

ptah13 wrote:

Wait, lets call her SuperstretchLabiaFlapper!


Yep, she's a flapper. You know any crotch shot of this woman would like a cut-away view of Arby's Big Montanna (probably with melted haverty cheese slathered about)...

That's it!! Big Montanna!!!! Big Mo for short...

I couldn't find a cut view of this, but it's a huge roast beef sandwich:

http://lotgk.files.wordpress.com/2007/1 … ontana.jpg

Damn...

Emmeran wrote:

So......
Did you hear that Denny's has come out with a new Breakfast deal in honor of this?

Yup, its call the Grand Suleman Breakfast and it consists of:

14 Eggs,
no Suasauge
and everyone else in the restaurant has to pay for it.

Yuk, Yuk

I expect to receive this joke in an e-mail from my mom in five, four, three...

jesusluvspegging wrote:

Octuplets' family reportedly faces foreclosure

Clearly, this woman is batty enough to expect some large donor or charity to swoop in and save her ass at the last moment. You know it's the grandmother's cross to bear that she's the one $23K behind on their mortgage because she's the one who's really been paying the bills. I hope they lock her crazy ass up and foster off all her rotten little cuntmuppets.

jesusluvspegging wrote:

Octuplets' family reportedly faces foreclosure

Don't worry about the poor gal losing her home, apparently she's already in the market for another one...  http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,497104,00.html

fnord wrote:

I hope nobody swoops in to rescue Octosow.  I tend to believe the government makes a very poor substitute parent, but in this case the government is far better than what her poor little bastards have for a mother.  Her various litters need to be scooped up and given to foster care.

And quickly, before they grow out of the "cute baby" stage and she stops liking them.

George Orr wrote:

fnord wrote:

I hope nobody swoops in to rescue Octosow.  I tend to believe the government makes a very poor substitute parent, but in this case the government is far better than what her poor little bastards have for a mother.  Her various litters need to be scooped up and given to foster care.

And quickly, before they grow out of the "cute baby" stage and she stops liking them.

She can always pop out another litter (with the "good doctor's" help). It's like when a male lion challenges and defeats the alpha male of a pride, then kills all the old male's cubs. All the fertile females immediately go into estrus; the new alpha male then plants his seed so all the next offspring will be HIS. Think of the octoairhead as a lioness crazily looking for the next stud to breed her so she can dump out another generation of spawn. Got to keep the product rolling out! (I'm not sure the lioness analogy works, but hey, it SOUNDS good.)

Last edited by scarydog (2009-02-21 19:31:42)

Decadence wrote:

Sadly, people have been sending her money. Apparently, she spent it on a manicure and video games. Yeah, the Octosow getting a manicure and shopping for video games some-how qualified as "news."

I don't know why anything about her is "news" anymore. Each week, she (or her parents, now) is the cycle for something. Her sprogs aren't even out the damn hospital yet. Having seen the deplorable conditions she already raises 6 kids, I simply can't imagine what the place will be like with 8 more babies in there, or the nature of fools who have been sending her money. Don't they know their taxes are already paying for her manicures?

Some dude thinks he might be the sperm donor...sounds like bukkake may have been involved.

The man said he twice made donations at home. In at least one instance, he said, Suleman kept the sperm sample warm by placing the cup containing the sample between her breasts.

"I just remember her saying when I donated that the doctor told her that she had to keep it warm by putting it between her -- between her breasts -- just to keep it warm, keep it room temperature until she took it in," he said.

George Orr wrote:

Lions?  Naaah.

http://www.willowbrookwildlife.org/imag … ossuml.jpg

More like that.

You do have a point. An insipid beast with many sucklings. Nothing noble about THAT!

fnord wrote:

A California-based nonprofit called Angels in Waiting has offered Suleman round-the-clock care and a place to stay with her 14 children. It would cost about $135,000 a month to provide the 12 caretakers necessary for the children, money that would have to come from public donations.

I give them about a year before they'll have a hard time getting enough money to buy 12 diapers.

headkicker_girl wrote:

More proof that this bitch is crazy.

Oh, hello, mom is letting you live with her, you fucking wack job.  You might want to be a little nicer to her.

Every one of them will eventually end up in foster care or with CPS.  An institutional adult life, either incarcerated or in mental custody awaits.

headkicker_girl wrote:

phreddy wrote:

headkicker_girl wrote:

More proof that this bitch is crazy.

Oh, hello, mom is letting you live with her, you fucking wack job.  You might want to be a little nicer to her.

Every one of them will eventually end up in foster care or with CPS.  An institutional adult life, either incarcerated or in mental custody awaits.

Yeah, it just seems like the story won't have a happy ending.  Mom will totally loser her mind and end up in an institution, and grandma will farm the kids out to foster care.  Luckily, she's baren, so she won't be able to produce any more once these are taken away.  I can't imagine there's anything left over from the workers comp case to fund any more in vitro.

She's baren?

I thought she was a person?

This story keeps getting weirder. Octo-mom porn?

Can I get a raise of hands who's gonna buy this?

Do these straight buddies of yours have children?  If so, then they're only saying that to you to make themselves less sad.

kim wrote:

What did she do with the money from all the interviews she has had?
More plastic surgery or what?

Well, I'd hope she had her womb serviced by a reputable gunsmith.  By this point, she's certainly exceeded the service life of the barrel, and by now it's probably starting to build up some serious heat fatigue. 

It's very important for you ladies to keep your weapons properly maintained.

She should have kept her mouth shut...

Hmmmm, if you've got 14 kids, no job and no home, you might not want to shout it out to the world.

I would happily pay for her kids and more of her face surgery then help foot the bill for Northern Trusts LA extravaganza. Oh wait, I did.

I would pay $1 million if they would stuff all 8 kids back up that ravaged hole.

fnord wrote:

Ick! Ick! Ick! Barf Hurl Vomit!

Hotdog, hallway.......  Enough said......

kim wrote:

well, I was speaking of her torn up face (which she has clearly had her nose and lips done and who knows what else), but yes - she should get her torn up vag all tucked back in as well.

She needs to get those tubes Rotorooted with a rasp file while she's at it.

Last edited by scarydog (2009-02-26 02:36:05)