#1 2009-07-24 23:56:44
During a conversation with a good friend of mine, he mentioned, with a giggle, that he's been invited to his cousins' big summer hog-roast out on the farm.
I might point out that this guys' family is from southern Indiana, is VERY "rural". Hell, even his 83-y-o grandmother gets her deer tags ever year, hoping to shoot a few that get in her garden. Very odd bunch. Deliverance comes to mind.
Anyway, he then makes this comment, and I can't believe my ears. I said, "umm, what did you just say?" and he replies, "I said that this year they said they're having real live midget tossing!".
I have to tell you, I have always giggled at the idea of tossing small people. I don't know why, but every time I saw a video of this, it has cracked me up.
Now I find myself faced with a real moral dilemma; should I seize this opportunity, finally checking "tossing small people" off my "to-do" list?
Can my psyche handle further debasing myself? Furthermore, can I cope with 6-8 hours around hard-core hillbillies?
Someone tell me that midget tossing isn't as magical and fulfilling as it sounds?
The thrill of the competition, mano-e-mano, to see who can land the wee fellow higher on the velcro wall... man... that just sounds so epic.
The people having it are a rodeo family, so they don't fuck around. Sometimes they'll bull-ride to amuse the family. Strange group of folk, those rodeo people.
(sigh)
Last edited by choad (2009-07-25 10:46:03)
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#2 2009-07-25 00:08:16
Do it.
Without question.
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#3 2009-07-25 00:11:54
Consenting adults, proper protection? Go for it.
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#4 2009-07-25 00:16:32
If I do this, I might have to finally break down and post a photo.
I'm not sure about the protection.
These aren't the kind of folk that are good with rules/laws.
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#5 2009-07-25 01:26:32
Any female midgets? You know you have been thinking of it.
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#6 2009-07-25 01:37:05
Dmtdust wrote:
Any female midgets? You know you have been thinking of it.
AKA "spinners".
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#7 2009-07-25 01:43:22
whiskytangofoxtrot wrote:
Dmtdust wrote:
Any female midgets? You know you have been thinking of it.
AKA "spinners".
Spinners? Ballerina's always seemed to have that ability.
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#8 2009-07-25 04:55:14
Pics or it didn't happen.
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#9 2009-07-25 07:20:13
PLEEEASE get them to invite me next year.
We have an olympics/ pig roast here every year too but nobody will spring for the midget toss, it's all skeet shooting and chug-a-lug stuff.
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#10 2009-07-25 10:58:04
jesusluvspegging wrote:
Pics or it didn't happen.
It was absolutely lovely. Do you want to talk about suspended chairs as well while we are at it?
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#11 2009-07-25 11:08:43
Dmtdust wrote:
jesusluvspegging wrote:
Pics or it didn't happen.
It was absolutely lovely. Do you want to talk about suspended chairs as well while we are at it?
I was addressing ptah.
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#12 2009-07-25 12:51:13
jesusluvspegging wrote:
Dmtdust wrote:
jesusluvspegging wrote:
Pics or it didn't happen.
It was absolutely lovely. Do you want to talk about suspended chairs as well while we are at it?
I was addressing ptah.
I've called the guy back and said I want to go. He's not 100% sure he wants to go but I'm putting on the full-court press.
This has been a lifelong dream of mine and it seems to have just fallen in my lap.
If I get to go, pics will be forthcoming. If I don't get to go, I'm going to get hammered and post here all night, in my depression.
Oh, and DMT, who told you about my female midget obsessions?
damn.. you're like Miss Cleo or something.
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#13 2009-07-25 13:43:15
Glad to see you've overcome your "moral dilemma" - anyone skulking around here should not have any issue with throwing a little person or two around. I hope it's a great time for you and them, and that the post-toss-off binge drinking leaves you only fleeting memories of late night congress with the sawed-off runt you favor most.
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#14 2009-07-25 14:46:30
lechero wrote:
Glad to see you've overcome your "moral dilemma" - anyone skulking around here should not have any issue with throwing a little person or two around. I hope it's a great time for you and them, and that the post-toss-off binge drinking leaves you only fleeting memories of late night congress with the sawed-off runt you favor most.
Well, I wanted to do it all-along, I just didn't want to admit that to you fine chaps.
My "friend" (Hmmpf!) who's cousin is having the party is still debating on going to some concert over going to the hog roast.
Fucking Marilyn Manson, at that.
If I lose out on midget tossing to Marilyn Manson, I don't know what I'll do. I even have a shirt all picked out and everything.
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#15 2009-07-25 15:53:05
Ok, so last night buddy "A" tells me about this wonderful opportunity to launch a member of the Lollipop Guild, whilst feasting and drinking.
So I tell him, "oh we gotta go" and he ho-hums around about it, saying he might go to this concert.
So, earlier, buddy "B" informs me that he and buddy "A" are definately going to the concert, even though buddy "A" told me, last night, that "B" stood him up on the concert.
Well, my wee-people throwing connection finally called me today (from the parking lot of Verizon Music Center) and said I misunderstood him, that there was never a conflict with the concert. The hog roast isn't till NEXT SATURDAY and we are DEFINITELY going!!!!
He did tell me that, in order to go, I must send him, "at least 20 midget porn links" (as if that was some kind of "challenge" to me).
haha He has no idea who he's dealing with. I'm going to flood his inbox with the most disgusting midget porn on Earth.
So, I'm going. Next sunday, expect to see pics.
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#16 2009-07-25 15:53:38
Why on earth would anyone want to see Manson right now? Aside from the comedic value, of course.
Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs
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#17 2009-07-25 16:11:43
I have no clue.
I'm not a big fan.
It is the Mayhem music festival, which includes (*shudder*!) Slayer, as well.
sad
I'm embarrassed to have a friend with such poor taste.
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#19 2009-07-25 17:47:24
Dmtdust wrote:
Spinners? Ballerina's always seemed to have that ability.
"I cum every-time that she pirouettes on me."
ptah13 wrote:
Well, I wanted to do it all-along, I just didn't want to admit that to you fine chaps.
Right - Be-Cause we're such a judgmental lot. Where did you think that you were?
jesusluvspegging wrote:
People who don't like Slayer don't get into Heaven.
Would owning Metacllica's "Ride The Lightening" and "Master Of Puppets" at least buy me a ticket to Purgatory, then?
Last edited by Decadence (2009-07-25 17:58:40)
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#20 2009-07-25 18:37:41
Go and take pictures, please. Maybe you or Karen should consider an Indiana blog even. I'd read it.
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#21 2009-07-25 18:55:17
icangetyouatoe wrote:
Go and take pictures, please. Maybe you or Karen should consider an Indiana blog even. I'd read it.
I hate to say it, but I could probably do a pretty good Indiana blog.
Even in ONLY our daily local news stories, I could find enough material for a fairly amusing "slice of Hoosier life".
"Unintentional Comedy" is as much a part of Hoosier heritage as the Indy 500.
EDIT:
I should see if I can BRING Karen!!!
Last edited by ptah13 (2009-07-25 18:55:54)
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#22 2009-07-25 19:30:27
Do it and post a link. Why the hell not?
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#23 2009-07-26 06:33:43
ptah13 wrote:
I hate to say it, but I could probably do a pretty good Indiana blog.
Even in ONLY our daily local news stories, I could find enough material for a fairly amusing "slice of Hoosier life".
State motto: "Be-Cause there simply isn't enough room for all of the United States' in-breds in Florida."
As larger cities go, though, I rather liked Indianapolis. Great clubs, a nice open park, and where else can you find a decent drive-in these days?
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#24 2009-08-02 13:57:23
I hope that whatever happened this weekend left you feeling so unclean that you dare not mention it again.
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#25 2009-08-03 09:47:56
Yeah, Indy is nice. Shipping warehouses the size of European countries, housing projects so large they have their own zip codes, hotter than Florida in the summer, colder than Minnesota in the winter, the air quality of a large Chinese city and home to the only Football team to get into the hall of fame as "the worst of all time".
Though it can be a much prettier city when the Future Farmers of America convention is in town, like it was the last time I was there on business. Mmmmm, farm girls.....
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#26 2009-08-03 10:50:39
whiskytangofoxtrot wrote:
Dmtdust wrote:
Any female midgets? You know you have been thinking of it.
AKA "spinners".
AHAH I just choked on my coffee. SPINNERS. ahhahahahhaha.
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#27 2009-08-03 23:13:03
It didn't happen.
I don't want to talk about it.
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#28 2009-08-03 23:23:37
GooberMcNutly wrote:
and home to the only Football team to get into the hall of fame as "the worst of all time".
You've got to be kidding, right?
Our team is the ONLY team to win 12 (or more) games for the last SIX YEARS in a ROW! (not sure if any team has ever had such a winning streak?). I might note we also won a Super Bowl in that time. Some teams in the NFL have never won a Super Bowl. The Colts have won them in two cities. I doubt you could come up with any statistics to support your claim that would overshadow things like "wins" and "Super Bowl wins", but hey, knock yourself out.
Sounds like some envy going on there. I can't blame you. It is nice to go to games and know that, 90% the time, your team is going to win.
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#29 2009-08-03 23:33:26
ptah13 wrote:
GooberMcNutly wrote:
and home to the only Football team to get into the hall of fame as "the worst of all time".
You've got to be kidding, right?
wank wank wank wank wank wank wank
HAHAHAHHA Y'ALL WATCH HOMOEROTIC SHOULDER-PAD CAPADES!
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#30 2009-08-03 23:38:32
jesusluvspegging wrote:
ptah13 wrote:
GooberMcNutly wrote:
and home to the only Football team to get into the hall of fame as "the worst of all time".
You've got to be kidding, right?
wank wank wank wank wank wank wankHAHAHAHHA Y'ALL WATCH HOMOEROTIC SHOULDER-PAD CAPADES!
Well.. yeah... ?!?
That's all we have, here in the corn.
Edit: Yeah, Indy has it's good points and bad points, but I'm not sure where Goober gets the "housing projects so big.." thing from? Comparable cities usually have more projects than we do. On top of that, we enjoy a pretty decent crime rate. I still know people who don't lock their doors at night (and have an Indianapolis zip code). Don't kill anyone, here. Our police have the highest murder conviction rate in the country. For several years in a row, our cops solved EVERY SINGLE murder case. Yes, I said ALL of them. Not a good place to wack someone, that is for sure.
I suggest taking your intended murder victim out to the boonies, before wacking them. Just an fyi.
Also, we really do still have old-school drive-in's. Nutty.
The "up" side is that our bar scene is pretty decent. We have tons of nice parks and you can actually go out at 3am and find an open store, even on Sunday's and holidays. Something I noticed you can't do in other comparable cities. The "down" side is, you can't buy alcohol on Sundays.
Last edited by ptah13 (2009-08-03 23:45:53)
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#31 2009-08-03 23:40:57
That's not true you also have date rape and church.
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#32 2009-08-04 07:19:17
ptah13 wrote:
You've got to be kidding, right?
Our team is the ONLY team to win 12 (or more) games for the last SIX YEARS in a ROW! (not sure if any team has ever had such a winning streak?). I might note we also won a Super Bowl in that time. Some teams in the NFL have never won a Super Bowl. The Colts have won them in two cities. I doubt you could come up with any statistics to support your claim that would overshadow things like "wins" and "Super Bowl wins", but hey, knock yourself out.
Sounds like some envy going on there. I can't blame you. It is nice to go to games and know that, 90% the time, your team is going to win.
I think he's referring to the days when C.O.L.T.S. was short for "Count On Losing This Sunday."
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#33 2009-08-04 08:18:34
karenw wrote:
ptah13 wrote:
You've got to be kidding, right?
Our team is the ONLY team to win 12 (or more) games for the last SIX YEARS in a ROW! (not sure if any team has ever had such a winning streak?). I might note we also won a Super Bowl in that time. Some teams in the NFL have never won a Super Bowl. The Colts have won them in two cities. I doubt you could come up with any statistics to support your claim that would overshadow things like "wins" and "Super Bowl wins", but hey, knock yourself out.
Sounds like some envy going on there. I can't blame you. It is nice to go to games and know that, 90% the time, your team is going to win.I think he's referring to the days when C.O.L.T.S. was short for "Count On Losing This Sunday."
They haven't had a loosing season in over a decade (and have won at least 10 games every year in the last 10 years). I guess the same can be said (in the NBA) for the Chicago Bulls, if you only want to count the years PRIOR to them getting Michael Jordan, huh?
Silly....
Last edited by ptah13 (2009-08-04 08:22:36)
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