#1 2008-08-06 11:19:53
Just a little something I received from a conservative friend. I'm posting it because it illustrates the mindless devotion the this empty suit, and because it will agitate many of my left-leaning Phriends. I still love you.
Phreddy
My fellow Americans:
As your future President I want to thank my supporters, for your mindless support of me, despite my complete lack of any legislative achievement, my pastor's relations with Louis Farrakhan and Libyan dictator Moamar Quadafi, or my blatantly leftist voting record while I present myself as some sort of bi-partisan agent of change.
I also like how my supporters claim my youthful drug use and criminal behavior somehow qualifies me for the Presidency after 8 years of claiming Bush's youthful drinking disqualifies him. Your hypocrisy is a beacon of hope shining over a sea of political posing.
I would also like to thank the Kennedy's for coming out in support of me. There's a lot of glamour behind the Kennedy name, even though Robert illegally wiretapped Martin Luther King, Jr. and Teddy killed a female employee with whom he was having an extra marital affair and who was pregnant with his child. And I'm not going anywhere near the cousins, both literally and figuratively. And I'd like to thank Oprah Winfrey for her support. Her love of meaningless empty platitudes will be the force that propels me to the White House.
Americans should vote for me, not because of my lack of experience or achievement , but because I make people feel good. Voting for me causes some white folk to feel relieved of their imagined, racist guilt. I say things that sound meaningful, but don't really mean anything because Americans are tired of things having meaning. If things have meaning, then that means you have to think about them.
Americans are tired of thinking. It's time to shut down the brain, and open up the heart. So when you go to vote, remember don't think, just do. And do it for me.
Thank You.
Barack Hussein Obama
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#2 2008-08-06 11:41:08
That is great Phwedd. Made me smile. How's tricks in Paradise? nearly got burned out?
D
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#3 2008-08-06 11:43:27
Repeating a man's middle name is not technically an argument.
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#4 2008-08-06 13:40:17
Phreddy, I think it's cute that you assume all your left-leaning neighbors here on High Street are excited about this guy, too.
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#5 2008-08-06 17:26:02
YAWN.
That's one of the problems with the right...they actually accept the nonsense in chain emails as facts. Of course if it wasn't for these same greedy yet gullible bastards, many Nigerians would be out of a job.
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#6 2008-08-06 18:02:39
headkicker_girl wrote:
YAWN.
That's one of the problems with the right...they actually accept the nonsense in chain emails as facts...
Don't forget the Bible, too.
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#7 2008-08-06 18:05:24
headkicker_girl wrote:
YAWN.
That's one of the problems with the right...they actually accept the nonsense in chain emails as facts. Of course if it wasn't for these same greedy yet gullible bastards, many Nigerians would be out of a job.
Damn straight! The democrats voted for him because... what was the reason again?
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#8 2008-08-06 19:47:27
Dmtdust wrote:
That is great Phwedd. Made me smile. How's tricks in Paradise? nearly got burned out?
D
My house was close enough to see the smoke and at night even the flames. We were never in real danger, but the damned smoke was pretty miserable for about three weeks. It's just now getting clear again.
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#9 2008-08-06 20:02:55
Zookeeper wrote:
headkicker_girl wrote:
YAWN.
That's one of the problems with the right...they actually accept the nonsense in chain emails as facts. Of course if it wasn't for these same greedy yet gullible bastards, many Nigerians would be out of a job.Damn straight! The democrats voted for him because... what was the reason again?
Same reason you guys voted for McCain...the alternatives sucked more.
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#10 2008-08-06 20:20:11
headkicker_girl wrote:
Same reason you guys voted for McCain...the alternatives sucked more.
Oxymoron, vis. English Cuisine, Irish Temperance, French Modesty, Black Unity.
It's all the same hideous hussle.
Last edited by choad (2008-08-06 20:20:47)
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#11 2008-08-07 01:20:57
headkicker_girl wrote:
Zookeeper wrote:
headkicker_girl wrote:
YAWN.
That's one of the problems with the right...they actually accept the nonsense in chain emails as facts. Of course if it wasn't for these same greedy yet gullible bastards, many Nigerians would be out of a job.Damn straight! The democrats voted for him because... what was the reason again?
Same reason you guys voted for McCain...the alternatives sucked more.
For the record, I'm not one of the guys who voted for McCain (I'm not a registered Republican). And if I had voted in the Democratic primary I wouldn't have voted for Obama.
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#12 2008-08-07 05:43:38
ah297900 wrote:
headkicker_girl wrote:
YAWN.
That's one of the problems with the right...they actually accept the nonsense in chain emails as facts...Don't forget the Bible, too.
It's a little-known fact that the end of Revelations originally stated, "Transcribe the words in this book and deliver them to no less than 10 of your friends lest ye be stricken by the LORD."
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#13 2008-08-07 13:46:09
tojo2000 wrote:
ah297900 wrote:
headkicker_girl wrote:
YAWN.
That's one of the problems with the right...they actually accept the nonsense in chain emails as facts...Don't forget the Bible, too.
It's a little-known fact that the end of Revelations originally stated, "Transcribe the words in this book and deliver them to no less than 10 of your friends lest ye be stricken by the LORD."
Just because I feel persnickety this morning, I feel compelled to point out the title of the book in question is "Revelation" - singular - because the book details a single revelation, not a series of revelations.
Carry on.
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#14 2008-08-07 15:27:16
You bastard! I can't believe you, Taint. I'm never sharing my fake scriptures with you, ever again.
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#15 2008-08-07 15:33:25
Fine. My god is bigger than your god anyway.
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#16 2008-08-07 16:11:17
Taint wrote:
Fine. My god is bigger than your god anyway.
That's only because your god measures from under the balls.
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#17 2008-08-07 20:40:53
Just going on record to say that I don't want any of those fuckers to be the next president.
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#18 2008-08-08 09:17:28
Can we just vote None of the Above, like in that horrible Eddie Murphy(??) movie?
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#19 2008-08-09 00:07:53
GooberMcNutly wrote:
Can we just vote None of the Above, like in that horrible Eddie Murphy(??) movie?
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#20 2008-08-09 01:03:54
headkicker_girl wrote:
Zookeeper wrote:
headkicker_girl wrote:
YAWN.
That's one of the problems with the right...they actually accept the nonsense in chain emails as facts. Of course if it wasn't for these same greedy yet gullible bastards, many Nigerians would be out of a job.Damn straight! The democrats voted for him because... what was the reason again?
Same reason you guys voted for McCain...the alternatives sucked more.
Seriously though, how could the alternatives have sucked more?
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#21 2008-08-09 01:38:00
Zookeeper wrote:
Damn straight! The democrats voted for him because... what was the reason again?
Nobody has voted for ANYBODY yet.
Sheeee.
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#22 2008-08-09 12:43:11
George Orr wrote:
Zookeeper wrote:
Damn straight! The democrats voted for him because... what was the reason again?
Nobody has voted for ANYBODY yet.
Sheeee.
Remember those funny things everybody was calling "primary elections" a few months ago Georgie?
Sheeee.
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#23 2008-08-09 15:49:55
There are no official nominees because the national conventions have not yet been held. Yeah, I know they're both a foregone conclusion and the media and everyone else has been talking about them for months as if they were already nominated; but neither party has held its national convention yet.
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#24 2008-08-09 16:34:45
There’s something seriously wrong with a system that produces such worthless candidates for office. Would you like an uppity affirmative action negro and the groups that have bought and paid for him? Or is a senile sociopath and the people who own him more to your liking.
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#25 2008-08-09 16:41:40
Dirckman wrote:
Seriously though, how could the alternatives have sucked more?
Poor Mike Huckabee. Forgotten so soon.
Also - choad, did you mean to type "hustle"?
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#26 2008-08-09 17:53:21
George Orr wrote:
There are no official nominees because the national conventions have not yet been held. Yeah, I know they're both a foregone conclusion and the media and everyone else has been talking about them for months as if they were already nominated; but neither party has held its national convention yet.
They weren't a forgone conclusion before the primaries. That they are now is because people voted for them. Was it somehow unclear those were the votes I was referring to?
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#27 2008-08-09 17:55:20
fnord wrote:
Would you like an uppity affirmative action negro and the groups that have bought and paid for him? Or is a senile sociopath and the people who own him more to your liking.
Actually fnord, we're still all holding out hoping you will run.
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#28 2008-08-09 18:40:21
Zookeeper wrote:
Actually fnord, we're still all holding out hoping you will run.
I don’t ass kiss well enough to raise the sums of money required to get elected.
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#29 2008-08-09 19:00:02
Zookeeper wrote:
Was it somehow unclear those were the votes I was referring to?
Well...yeah.
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#30 2008-08-09 19:13:27
fnord wrote:
Zookeeper wrote:
Actually fnord, we're still all holding out hoping you will run.
I don’t ass kiss well enough to raise the sums of money required to get elected.
The Internet has made marketing so much more affordable though. Viral marketing is the name of the game. You need to register www.A-Lynched-Negro-In-Every-Pot.com and get your message out.
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#31 2008-08-09 19:14:57
fnord wrote:
There’s something seriously wrong with a system that produces such worthless candidates for office. Would you like an uppity affirmative action negro and the groups that have bought and paid for him? Or is a senile sociopath and the people who own him more to your liking.
Actually he was accepted to Harvard while withholding his race from the application process.
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#32 2008-08-09 20:03:04
Look, one of his parents was African (as in African, not African-American) and the other parent was Midwest-white, which is about as white as you get in North America.
That makes Obama pretty much precisely 50/50. That means it is just as accurate to call him a white man as a black man; either attribution is equally correct/incorrect.
Yet I hear no one bitching about the overprivileged, smartass elitist, uppity cracker. Why is that?
Last edited by George Orr (2008-08-09 20:04:20)
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#33 2008-08-09 20:50:57
George Orr wrote:
Look, one of his parents was African (as in African, not African-American) and the other parent was Midwest-white, which is about as white as you get in North America.
That makes Obama pretty much precisely 50/50. That means it is just as accurate to call him a white man as a black man; either attribution is equally correct/incorrect.
Yet I hear no one bitching about the overprivileged, smartass elitist, uppity cracker. Why is that?
Now George, you've spent enough time in the south to be familiar with the "one drop" rule. 50% is more than one drop, and Barack doesn't look white enough to pass, so there you have it.
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#34 2008-08-09 20:55:32
headkicker_girl wrote:
George Orr wrote:
Look, one of his parents was African (as in African, not African-American) and the other parent was Midwest-white, which is about as white as you get in North America.
That makes Obama pretty much precisely 50/50. That means it is just as accurate to call him a white man as a black man; either attribution is equally correct/incorrect.
Yet I hear no one bitching about the overprivileged, smartass elitist, uppity cracker. Why is that?Now George, you've spent enough time in the south to be familiar with the "one drop" rule. 50% is more than one drop, and Barack doesn't look white enough to pass, so there you have it.
Hell, if we were still held to that, a substantial number of Southerners wouldn't pass the test in either category.
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#35 2008-08-09 20:58:48
And, now for something completely different:
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#36 2008-08-09 21:00:41
Barackroll'd!
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#37 2008-08-09 21:14:44
Taint wrote:
Hell, if we were still held to that, a substantial number of Southerners wouldn't pass the test in either category.
Try "none." If your family's been in the area more than three or four generations, you got yourself a touch of the tarbrush in ya. That's the main reason all this racist shit about Obama gets on my nerves. If you hate his positions, or you think he's a tool of The Powers, then fine; but the skin game is nothing but an anachronism, and boring to boot.
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#38 2008-08-09 21:14:55
George Orr wrote:
… overprivileged, smartass elitist, uppity cracker.
That description fits McInsane better than it fits Obongo.
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#39 2008-08-09 21:22:02
George Orr wrote:
Taint wrote:
Hell, if we were still held to that, a substantial number of Southerners wouldn't pass the test in either category.
Try "none." If your family's been in the area more than three or four generations, you got yourself a touch of the tarbrush in ya. That's the main reason all this racist shit about Obama gets on my nerves. If you hate his positions, or you think he's a tool of The Powers, then fine; but the skin game is nothing but an anachronism, and boring to boot.
That’s PC Bullshit! Most White Southerners are descended from European criminals, indentured servants, religious nuts, poor people rounded up and put on ships, and others that Europe decided to toss out. Living in proximity to Indians and negroes doesn’t cause their DNA to jump on White people.
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#40 2008-08-09 21:37:14
fnord wrote:
George Orr wrote:
Taint wrote:
Hell, if we were still held to that, a substantial number of Southerners wouldn't pass the test in either category.
Try "none." If your family's been in the area more than three or four generations, you got yourself a touch of the tarbrush in ya. That's the main reason all this racist shit about Obama gets on my nerves. If you hate his positions, or you think he's a tool of The Powers, then fine; but the skin game is nothing but an anachronism, and boring to boot.
That’s PC Bullshit! Most White Southerners are descended from European criminals, indentured servants, religious nuts, poor people rounded up and put on ships, and others that Europe decided to toss out. Living in proximity to Indians and negroes doesn’t cause their DNA to jump on White people.
No, it's pretty well documented. Strom Thurmond isn't the only white southerner who liked to split a little black oak from time to time. Heck, most white southerners, if they are being honest, can tell you exactly when the questionable DNA entered the family tree, or they can tell you about the relative who had a black girlfriend and kids on the other side of town or the next town over.
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#41 2008-08-09 21:49:36
fnord wrote:
Living in proximity to Indians and negroes doesn’t cause their DNA to jump on White people.
You are quite right about that; but fucking does, as headkick points out.
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