#1 2007-11-06 14:22:39

kim

http://men.msn.com/articlebl.aspx?cp-do … >1=10619

You know, maybe I haven't searched well enough but I am sick of all things geared towards women. Magazines, TV shows, lifestyle, and in this case - advice.

Now obviously catering towards women in means of fashion, sex, and hairstyles is big business - what about the (lezbots) women who actually care about knowing how their car runs, savings and all other economical issues, fixing shit around the house (other than getting that oh so pesky stain out of your favorite linen shirt), and all other important things of that nature.

I think I am more inclined to reading Esquire than Martha Stewart Living. I seem to find more useful information (see link above).


"Dip me in honey and throw me to the lesbians!"

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#2 2007-11-06 14:43:11

I think that's because Esquire and Details are being written for intensely repressed homosexuals.

Really tho, you're only condemning the whole of Western Culture for the past few millennia. If it were more expeditious to promote healthy self-images for women, then we wouldn't see so many ads for Atkins Lipodissolving Lip-Plumper Now With Six Weeks to a Slimmer Figure. Between Bratz Dolls and "America's Next Top Model," there's really no escape for you, sweetie darling.

http://www.uktv.co.uk/images/standardItem/L1/528040_L1.jpg

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#3 2007-11-06 15:20:51

Do what I do.  Get a copy of Maxim, light up a good cigar, and enjoy a snifter of the finest brandy you can afford.

It helps if you do this in your 'reading room'.

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#4 2007-11-06 15:27:05

Roger_That wrote:

Do what I do.  Get a copy of Maxim, light up a good cigar, and enjoy a snifter of the finest brandy you can afford.

It helps if you do this in your 'reading room'.

Or do what I do and only read pretentious shit like Harpers, Mother Jones, Atlantic Monthly, New Republic and the Utne Reader. 

And I occasionally pick up a copy of Martha Stewart's Living.  The decorating ideas suck ass, but the recipes are usually pretty darn good.

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#6 2007-11-06 15:33:00

I actually like to wipe my ass on Martha Stewart Living, and then throw the remnants into my fire pit to use as a fire starter.

Recycling at its finest.

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#7 2007-11-06 15:36:24

Actually, if in a pinch, and at one of the 'finer' airports like Bermuda International (or you happen to be flying British Airways) grab some of the pretentious magazines laying around near the first class lounge.  They always make for great reading if you're into Euro Trash.

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#8 2007-11-06 15:36:45

Roger_That wrote:

I actually like to wipe my ass on Martha Stewart Living, and then throw the remnants into my fire pit to use as a fire starter.

Recycling at its finest.

I hear if you inhale the smoke you can get a really good buzz.

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#9 2007-11-06 15:40:04

Scotty wrote:

I hear if you inhale the smoke you can get a really good buzz.

Perhaps I should cover my fire pit with something latex???

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#10 2007-11-06 15:41:06

Roger_That wrote:

Scotty wrote:

I hear if you inhale the smoke you can get a really good buzz.

Perhaps I should cover my fire pit with something latex???

I'm sure you have something around the house.

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#11 2007-11-06 15:51:15

Well my mouth certainly won't fit.

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#12 2007-11-06 16:13:09

If the mass impulse is not to abuse someone who expresses needs & shows weakness, could there at least be a standardized "advice column" thing that is an irregular feature?  Crap like that gets attention & $ more than the usual bitterness and fetishized ennui.

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#13 2007-11-06 16:26:25

headkicker_girl wrote:

Or do what I do and only read pretentious shit like Harpers, Mother Jones, Atlantic Monthly, New Republic and the Utne Reader.

Wow, an identical subscription list as my sisters.   She's bitter too.

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#14 2007-11-06 16:44:19

opsec wrote:

Wow, an identical subscription list as my sisters.   She's bitter too.

Does she practice law?  It has that effect on one.

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#15 2007-11-06 16:47:44

No, she was an English teacher for many years and is now in nursing.  So I suspect it's her reading habits :)

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#16 2007-11-06 18:10:13

kim wrote:

You know, maybe I haven't searched well enough but I am sick of all things geared towards women. Magazines, TV shows, lifestyle, and in this case - advice.

Get back in the kitchen Missy, and bake me some pie.

Felch

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#17 2007-11-06 18:13:00

kim

felch wrote:

kim wrote:

You know, maybe I haven't searched well enough but I am sick of all things geared towards women. Magazines, TV shows, lifestyle, and in this case - advice.

Get back in the kitchen Missy, and bake me some pie.

Felch

Well I believe Martha has a pumpkin pie recipe in this months issue so you are in luck!

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#18 2007-11-06 18:15:10

Q: Why did the woman cross the road?

A: WHAT I WANT TO KNOW IS, WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE DOING OUT OF THE KITCHEN IN THE FIRST PLACE???

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#19 2007-11-06 18:17:48

kim wrote:

Well I believe Martha has a pumpkin pie recipe in this months issue so you are in luck!

In fact she does.  It's made with 1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon of chipotle-chile powder to add a "subtle heat" and served with a bourbon cream sauce.

I'm not a big fan of pumpkin pie but I do plan to try her pecan praline tart.

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#20 2007-11-06 18:19:17

headkicker_girl wrote:

kim wrote:

Well I believe Martha has a pumpkin pie recipe in this months issue so you are in luck!

In fact she does.  It's made with 1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon of chipotle-chile powder to add a "subtle heat" and served with a bourbon cream sauce.

I'm not a big fan of pumpkin pie but I do plan to try her pecan praline tart.

Mustn't respond. Too easy. Mustn't respond...

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#21 2007-11-06 18:20:53

Q: What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
A: Nothing, she's already been told twice.

Q: When is it OK to spit an ugly woman in the face?
A: When her mustache is on fire

Q: Why did the lesbian cross the road?
A: to suck my dick

Q: How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two - one to change the light bulb, and one to suck my dick

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#22 2007-11-06 18:21:50

opsec wrote:

No, she was an English teacher for many years and is now in nursing.  So I suspect it's her reading habits :)

Nursing and teaching English are both occupations where one has to deal with incredibly stupid clients.  Either profession will produce burned out bitter practitioners.

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#23 2007-11-06 18:23:43

http://cruel.storagelake.com/women_folding.jpg

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#24 2007-11-06 18:30:15

Q: What do you call a room full of women, half with PMS, half with yeast infections?
A: A whine and cheese party

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#25 2007-11-06 18:32:59

Q: Why do women have breasts?
A: So men will talk to them.

Q: What's worse than a male chauvinistic pig?
A: A women who won't do what she's told.

Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.

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#26 2007-11-06 18:46:41

DoucheEllington wrote:

If the mass impulse is not to abuse someone who expresses needs & shows weakness, could there at least be a standardized "advice column" thing that is an irregular feature? Crap like that gets attention & $ more than the usual bitterness and fetishized ennui.

As long as it's all declarative statements, no outright questions. There's nothing like the soft underbelly of curiosity, or so I hear.

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#27 2007-11-06 18:57:39

kim

I think I mostly hate the style of writing in either magazines or websites that are for women.
The annoying things like:


My friend and I drank cosmos at the bar discussing our thought about dating younger men. My friend gushed about her recent encounter with a real hottie but later found out that he was too much of a mamas boy. I looked at her while she motioned to our hot waiter that she would like another apple martini.


God damn it.

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#28 2007-11-06 19:06:04

BWAHHAHA.  That pic that Ops posted, and Zed's jokes have me laughing.  Juvenile, I know.  But still...

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#29 2007-11-07 00:20:18

Q: Whats black and blue and hates sex ?
A: Zombie Elvis in prison.

Felch

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