#1 2010-04-16 10:53:29

Best.  Opening Paragraph.  Ever.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/04/15/fr … google_cnn

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#3 2010-04-16 20:44:06

Eeek. I told my sister today that I need to find a FWB. Now I'm not so sure.

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#4 2010-04-16 21:05:26

Redo the slang, and that's straight out of every anti STD ("VD" in my day) pamphlet ever.

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#5 2010-04-16 21:27:35

The whole article is booger-eatin' idiocy.  Monogamous couples are safer from STD's.  People who have multiple sexual contacts are more at risk for STD's.  Big drooly DUH.

So which is safer:  a FWB, or desperate sex with random strangers (e.g., prostitutes or bar pickups)?

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#6 2010-04-16 22:20:33

One way to significantly reduce your odds of getting VD is to refuse to have sex with negros or members of your own race who have sex with them.  50% of all persons infected with HIV in America are negros; even young negro females have std rates far above far above females of other races.

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#7 2010-04-16 23:01:30

fnord wrote:

One way to significantly reduce your odds of getting VD is to refuse to have sex with

gay men.

Don't even try to deny it.

Last edited by sigmoid freud (2010-04-16 23:08:14)

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#8 2010-04-16 23:37:18

The only problem with not having sex with other gay men is that it's impossible to have sex with men who are straight without drugging them into an unconscious state!  But seriously, the only time I ever caught gonorrhea was during the pre-AIDS era when a mud shark I refused to have sex with seduced one of my fuck buddies and indirectly infected me through him.  White gay men have a much lower rate of HIV and other STDs than the male negro population.  I am HIV negative, and I attribute that both to being careful and not having sex with negros or anybody I even suspected of having a history of mud sharking.

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#9 2010-04-17 00:14:24

karenw wrote:

Eeek. I told my sister today that I need to find a FWB. Now I'm not so sure.

Frankfurter Wertpapierbörse? They should be fine--the recession is over and stocks are on the rise again.

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#10 2010-04-17 00:23:59

ah297900 wrote:

Frankfurter Wertpapierbörse?

I'm not German so I must ask; what does the Frankfurt Stock Exchange have to do with getting laid?

Hey karenw.

Last edited by MSG Tripps (2010-04-17 00:24:40)

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#11 2010-04-17 00:29:40

MSG Tripps wrote:

ah297900 wrote:

Frankfurter Wertpapierbörse?

I'm not German so I must ask; what does the Frankfurt Stock Exchange have to do with getting laid?

Hey karenw.

She was looking for a FWB. This is one that is free of disease. Although, being German, the FWB may eventually want to shit on her chest. You take the bad with the good, I guess.

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#12 2010-04-17 00:33:11

ah297900 wrote:

This is one that is free of disease.

Sure thing.

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#13 2010-04-17 01:17:11

karenw wrote:

Eeek. I told my sister today that I need to find a FWB. Now I'm not so sure.

A vibrator, and a kitten.  Not together.

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#14 2010-04-17 02:36:31

George Orr wrote:

The whole article is booger-eatin' idiocy.  Monogamous couples are safer from STD's.  People who have multiple sexual contacts are more at risk for STD's.  Big drooly DUH.

So which is safer:  a FWB, or desperate sex with random strangers (e.g., prostitutes or bar pickups)?

Well, buried in the stupid (like most science reporting) was the actual story:  statistically speaking people are more likely to rationalize not asking annoying questions of FWBs or require them to use protection, even though they're not necessarily any less likely to be "clean".  And of course, your chances of monogamy being mutually agreed to are virtually nil, since that's kind of the point.

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#15 2010-04-17 06:45:09

Dmtdust wrote:

karenw wrote:

Eeek. I told my sister today that I need to find a FWB. Now I'm not so sure.

A vibrator, and a kitten.  Not together.

Oh, I know. I just bought new double-A's, so I'm good on the first one for a while. And I have 2 kitties, although neither one is a baby anymore.

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#16 2010-04-17 06:49:00

Dmtdust wrote:

karenw wrote:

Eeek. I told my sister today that I need to find a FWB. Now I'm not so sure.

A vibrator, and a kitten.  Not together.

God, Dusty, you're so vanilla.

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#17 2010-04-17 17:23:19

Fled wrote:

Dmtdust wrote:

karenw wrote:

Eeek. I told my sister today that I need to find a FWB. Now I'm not so sure.

A vibrator, and a kitten.  Not together.

God, Dusty, you're so vanilla.

And I used to be so cutting edge...a mass of concurrent entanglements, menage how ever many's, and the rest.  I blame it on detergents and soy products.

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#18 2010-04-18 15:45:50

fnord wrote:

I am HIV negative, and I attribute that both to being careful and not having sex with negros or anybody I even suspected of having a history of mud sharking.

I heard condoms work pretty well, too.

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#19 2010-04-18 15:50:26

karenw wrote:

Eeek. I told my sister today that I need to find a FWB. Now I'm not so sure.

There is a much lower incidence of women passing STDs to each other.

Just sayin'.

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#20 2010-04-18 16:41:32

Taffy is lookin for some lay-dey action!

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#21 2010-04-18 18:28:49

Dmtdust wrote:

Taffy is lookin for some lay-dey action!

Hey, I'm just trying to be a friend... with benefits.

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#22 2010-04-18 19:40:59

I was just about to say . . . let the fapping begin.

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#23 2010-04-18 20:03:46

Taffy, meet Karen, Karen, meet Taffy!  Ladies, please provide the acceptable media when you've worked this all out!

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#24 2010-04-18 21:13:21

THAT didn't take long.

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#25 2010-04-18 21:31:42

I followed it to the logical conclusion, and then asked for media backup of the event.  I am just trying to keep all the permutations straight.

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#26 2010-04-19 03:51:23

karenw wrote:

I was just about to say . . . let the fapping begin.

Traditionally, it begins when a lady is single.

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#27 2010-04-19 05:29:09

karenw wrote:

I was just about to say . . . let the fapping begin.

Okay, karenw, what I want to know is, what is the sound of a woman's one-hand-clapping?  Onomatopoeia must out.

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#28 2010-04-19 17:10:25

Karen, I highly recommend the same sex hookup at this time in your life. It was enlightening, it was fun, and while I remain sadly a full blown heterosexual, it was definitely awesome to discuss the anthropologie catalog at length with my sex partner for a couple of weekends. Seriously. I hope my daughter someday tries it too. It was a very positive experience all the way around.

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#29 2010-04-19 18:25:21

icangetyouatoe wrote:

Karen, I highly recommend the same sex hookup at this time in your life. It was enlightening, it was fun, and while I remain sadly a full blown heterosexual, it was definitely awesome to discuss the anthropologie catalog at length with my sex partner for a couple of weekends. Seriously. I hope my daughter someday tries it too. It was a very positive experience all the way around.

Picts or it never happened

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#30 2010-04-19 18:31:07

icangetyouatoe wrote:

I hope my daughter someday tries it too.

I hope she does too.

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#31 2010-04-19 18:36:41

icangetyouatoe wrote:

Karen, I highly recommend the same sex hookup at this time in your life. It was enlightening, it was fun, and while I remain sadly a full blown heterosexual, it was definitely awesome to discuss the anthropologie catalog at length with my sex partner for a couple of weekends. Seriously. I hope my daughter someday tries it too. It was a very positive experience all the way around.

Toe, I don’t know how old your daughter is, but most women today get the lesbian experimentation taken care of during their college years.  It’s better this way, because the ones for whom being lesbian was meant to be avoid traumatizing themselves, a male partner, and minor children with a midlife coming out drama.

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#32 2010-04-19 18:42:36

I'm a lesbian.

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#33 2010-04-19 19:12:09

Taint wrote:

I'm a lesbian.

Come over here and eat me out, then.

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#34 2010-04-19 19:20:06

George Orr wrote:

Taint wrote:

I'm a lesbian.

Come over here and eat me out, then.

I'm a lesbian with serious issues surrounding sex.

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