#1 2007-12-26 02:52:34

Before it becomes an SFgate objet d'art:

Tiger Kills 1 After Escaping

One person was killed and two others were seriously injured Tuesday evening after a tiger at the San Francisco Zoo escaped from its cage shortly after the facility closed.

One tiger escaped around 5 p.m. and was later shot and killed by the authorities, the police said. It was too early to determine how the tiger broke free, they said.

Early but unconfirmed reports said that as many as four tigers escaped from the Lion House, in the center of the 100-acre zoo, which sits along the Great Highway and is next to the Pacific Ocean.

The authorities evacuated the zoo after the incident (source)

Just something for the rest of you to enjoy after you can allow yourselves to return to teh Intarwebz. Now that you're done forcibly avoiding this year-round fakeness in favor of your families, welcome back to the Toxic Planet. Believe it or not, the world has continued to turn whilst you were exchanging gifts you couldn't afford.

I've sent the other three tigers to your house. See what happens when you let Jews control the media?

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#2 2007-12-26 11:45:10

I was going to post this, but with the heading "Here, kitty, kitty..."

No expensive gift exchanges here. I'm holding out for New Year's, other than the books I sent my father and my step-mother. Alas, they had to spend their holiday in Wichita Falls.

The Jews control the media? I thought it was the banking sector. Now I'm confused.

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#3 2007-12-26 21:12:58

Taint wrote:

The Jews control the media? I thought it was the banking sector. Now I'm confused.

There's a difference between the two? Go ask Fnordice.

I'm impressed that this story really developed some legs (paws?). It was carried on the national evening broadcasts...but that's pretty much what you get for the post-Xmas news lull. Apparently, there's some speculation that the tigers were released intentionally, as it's unlikely a fully grown Siberian could fling itself up and over a fence at a distance of over ten meters. Meow, meow NOM NOM NOM...

Last edited by pALEPHx (2007-12-27 05:22:02)

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#4 2007-12-26 21:24:32

pALEPHx wrote:

Taint wrote:

The Jews control the media? I thought it was the banking sector. Now I'm confused.

It was my impression that most Jews can't even control themselves.  Durrrrrrrrr!  Eh.  Urrrrrrrrrrr.

pALEPHx wrote:

Apparently, there's some speculation that the tigers were released intentionally, as it's unlikely a fully grown Bengal could fling itself up and over a fence at a distance of over ten meters. Meow, meow NOM NOM NOM...

And I thought I was going overboard by giving my monsters a vacation rotisserie chicken feast.

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#5 2007-12-26 23:15:19

pALEPHx wrote:

It was carried on the national evening broadcasts...but that's pretty much what you get for the post-Xmas news lull.

More like a post-Xmas news LOL.

pALEPHx wrote:

Apparently, there's some speculation that the tigers were released intentionally, as it's unlikely a fully grown Bengal could fling itself up and over a fence at a distance of over ten meters. Meow, meow NOM NOM NOM...

Kitty had a taste for long pork: she ate parts of two other visitors before she was caught!

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#6 2007-12-27 06:12:59

It is well known that when out walking you must watch your rear to guard against the man-eaters of San Francisco.

For more tiger tales I highly reccomend The Man-Eaters of Kumaon . Jim Corbett's books were quite influential when I was a kid.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Corbett_%28hunter%29

Last edited by Johnny Rotten (2007-12-27 06:13:39)

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#7 2007-12-27 09:18:44

So now a number of people are strongly suggesting that the tiger was taunted and possibly baited and enabled by the 17-year old "victim," Carlos Sousa Jr.  His parents,Carlos & Marilza Sousa, are predictably publicly critical of the zoo and have taken no responsibility for rearing a fucktard who deserved to be eaten by something, though perhaps more by a Jeffrey Dahmer type than a big cat trapped for our amusement.

Anyone notice a "Carlos Sousa Had It Coming" blog & some organized harassment of the Sousas?  Lemme know if you do...

They could have just taken the tiger to Central PA and let it play in the road...

Last edited by DoucheEllington (2007-12-27 09:20:17)

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#8 2007-12-27 11:41:50

Here's another example of a stupid guy feeding the animals.  Actually, I understand he was looking for hthe remote.

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/69894/man … arge_snake

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#9 2007-12-27 13:40:28

Fled wrote:

Here's another example of a stupid guy feeding the animals.  Actually, I understand he was looking for hthe remote.

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/69894/man … arge_snake

http://akvideos.metacafe.com/ItemFiles/%5BFrom%20www.metacafe.com%5D%2069894.293748.1.jpg

That guy's too skinny to get any snake play in this neck of the woods.  MY anaconda don't want none unless he's got buns, hun.  Durrrrrrr.  Baby got snacked.

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#10 2007-12-27 19:46:22

http://www.xmere.com/forums/uploads/highstreet/polarbear_attack.jpg
Just stand there. We'll keep gnawing.



If one of the people who were attacked was responsible for his own injuries, then how has this become such a "concern for zoo safety" or a "question about dangerous animals in captivity," and not merely Darwin Award fodder?

And I could've sworn another Sousa was responsible for "seeing stars and stripes forever."

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#11 2007-12-27 21:29:45

The Chronicle has quoted authorities as saying the cat was simply acting as a wild animal would act. It seems highly unlikely the tiger attacked without provocation. Tragic, of course, but if the kids involved were being stupid, they brought it on themselves.

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#12 2007-12-27 23:27:03

DoucheEllington wrote:

Fled wrote:

Here's another example of a stupid guy feeding the animals.  Actually, I understand he was looking for hthe remote.

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/69894/man … arge_snake

http://akvideos.metacafe.com/ItemFiles/ … 3748.1.jpg

That guy's too skinny to get any snake play in this neck of the woods.  MY anaconda don't want none unless he's got buns, hun.  Durrrrrrr.  Baby got snacked.

Cute lyrical quote, but you've been Snopsed.

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#13 2007-12-28 00:12:34

whosasailorthen wrote:

That guy's too skinny to get any snake play in this neck of the woods.  MY anaconda don't want none unless he's got buns, hun.  Durrrrrrr.  Baby got snacked.

Cute lyrical quote, but you've been Snopsed.

Stories such as this are like falling in love: I can pretend that they are real, and that makes me a happier cat than knowing that it's all a big lie & that people consume each other too much to allow snakes or other creatures to do so.  Excuse me while I go sob heavily in the shower of my SRO hotel. 

Allow me to post a video for "I Will Follow You into the Dark," which is what I would sing at the funeral of anyone actually eaten by a snake if I could actually sing with this swollen, forked tongue:

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#14 2007-12-28 09:07:13

A one-two punch for you.

We'll come visit when you're sleeping, darling.

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#15 2007-12-31 14:21:01

Sleep?  Who told you I do that anymore?

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#16 2007-12-31 17:03:29

http://www.neatorama.com/images/2006-12/love-hate-baby.jpg

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#17 2008-01-10 03:19:37

Yeah, this is gonna end well...

Houston Zoo Lets Visitors Play "Tug of War" with Lions

The video below, taken by Houston attorney Jesse Ayala, was taken two days after the tiger attack at the San Francisco Zoo last December. The video shows caretakers at the Houston Zoo throwing a 20-pound chunk of raw meat tied onto a rope into a lion’s pen. Guests then get to play tug-of-war with the lion. (source)

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#18 2008-01-10 19:44:17

UPDATE This moron is too stupid to have his own Quiki-Mart. Although I suspect he already works at his parent's shop. 

"We didn't do nothing"

Obviously he has never heard of a double negative.....

The parents of the dead kid aren't too bright either.  But then they are Latinos.

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#19 2008-01-10 21:56:07

God, I didn't even realize how much I missed having the time to fuckabout on this site.

The concentration of intelligence here is higher than that which lies within 50 square miles of me (save Ops).

heh.  Where is Ops these days?  My return may be a brief windfall, but nevertheless you should still feel blessed, fuckers.

RT

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#20 2008-01-11 10:55:44

This is just like the Chinese zoos. How cruel is it for the tigers not to be able to get to juicy goodies inside the outer packaging?

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