#1 2010-01-10 11:10:10

yeah, maybe on this kinder, gentler version, I'll dare ask for help:

I need to get out of my lease.  My current housemate has thrown parties during which I have had a netbook stolen, she is so unpleasantly unreasonable I can't even have fun tormenting her, my mail has been tampered with to the tune of finding checks w/out envelopes crammed into the bottom of my mailbox (I then got a PO box), and much as I despise the War On Drugs, she smokes pot all day and acts like she's on meth, and people I do not know are in and out of here all the time.  In short, it's intolerable -- I live in New York State, I am on a lease with her (I had to find a place fast and apparently do not have an operating bullshit detector), and cannot afford a lawyer now.  I have already signed and paid for a place with month-to-month leasing in the next town in case I manage to offend one of the local drug dealers.

How can I get out of this without paying more money to allow this wretch to live in a whole house by herself?

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#2 2010-01-10 11:14:30

Lace said roommates pot with heroin, the pure uncut variety.  Said roomie tokes up, seizes up and takes up residences in either:  A.  Rehab    or   B.  the Morgue


Problem solved.


You are Welcome.

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#3 2010-01-10 11:59:13

Reeeeal simple:  Put in an anonymous call to the police about the drugs, and make sure you are somewhere else when they arrive.  Try to time this so that plenty of other lowlifes are visiting; there will likely be at least one or two with criminal records.  Your housemate will be mired in legal shit for a long time; she might even flee to escape the hassles.  Word will get out about the arrests and the other lowlifes in town will avoid the house.

Alternative:  There is probably at least one free legal clinic in your area.  Find it.

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#4 2010-01-10 12:30:07

Take the later choice, the others are very dicey, and dangerous.

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#5 2010-01-10 12:42:17

Thanks for the input.

Em, if I could get pure, uncut heroin, I'd just OD myself.  The drawers at the morgue are in turn-key condition.

I've considered the police thing, and have a contingency plan as a last resort.  This plan does not yet include an escape hatch somewhere none of these small-handed inbred nutsacks have friends, relatives, or business associates, however.

The free legal clinic?  Laughable.  I am going to end up using the local service available to abused spouses/partners, which at least answers their phone and will set up appointments for stuff like this, since getting the hell out of Dodge/CrazyTown often involves breaking a lease or proving you have a right to live in the place your partner leased in only his or her name.

Last edited by bezoar_d'coeur (2010-01-10 12:44:05)

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#6 2010-01-10 13:36:58

Apartment, or House?

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#7 2010-01-10 15:14:39

the dreadful duplex.

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#8 2010-01-10 15:53:17

I don't suppose you've considered simply abandoning everything and striking out on the road in a journey of introspection and self-discovery during which you'll meet individuals who, through their own struggles and experiences, will awaken you to the vast potential which exists within you, thereby helping you find peace and contentment with yourself and bringing you to a greater sense of self awareness?

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#9 2010-01-10 16:03:52

Is getting one of Loser’s lowlife friends to assume your lease a possibility?  I realize this would have to be approved by the landlord, but I’m putting it out there as a possibility for you to consider.  Whatever you do, don’t do a sublet, as you would still be responsible for the trashing of the property.

Last edited by fnord (2010-01-10 16:04:22)

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#10 2010-01-10 16:16:14

Taint wrote:

I don't suppose you've considered simply abandoning everything and striking out on the road in a journey of introspection and self-discovery during which you'll meet individuals who, through their own struggles and experiences, will awaken you to the vast potential which exists within you, thereby helping you find peace and contentment with yourself and bringing you to a greater sense of self awareness?

Hmm, kind of a toss-up as to whether this or attempted murder sounds more fun.

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#11 2010-01-10 17:44:27

housemate from hell

Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs

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#12 2010-01-10 22:47:41

Taint:  For a time, my fondest wish was to be a train-riding hobo, even after a friend's psychologist told me, at a holiday party, that I'd be gang-raped by meaner hobos & tramps.  My reply: "That's gotta be better than my graduate career at this point, at least, if the hobos also kill me." 

But now I have cats, and can't be so blase about wandering around, incurring hobo-induced rectal bleeding and knife wounds.

fnord: Great idea, & I am trying as much as I can, given that anything said seems not to be remembered a few hours later.  Seriously.  I'm also looking for contacts in prison charities to see if anyone getting out of the state pen needs a place around here to crash for a few months, since I'd sign over the lease w/out doing a credit or background check (not a sublet, but actually having someone else incur responsibility for any damage done during his or her stay).

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#13 2010-01-11 00:58:08

Thanks Taint, I now have a better understanding of you.

Bezoar....it will be eternally more satisfying for you if the final confrontation includes copious amounts of splattered blood.

Should you be located in the SoCal, I have few blokes who would be happy to help....

   ...we can make it look like a drug deal gone bad.

Last edited by Emmeran (2010-01-11 00:58:36)

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#14 2010-01-11 13:23:30

kim

You need to document every single incident that has happened. Take pictures and have as close to dates as  you possibly can. Exact dates are obviously best, but even if you can just pin point the month then that should work, too. Keep all of these things together in a notebook.

Head to your local library and pick up some "renters guides" by NOLO. Stay away from the "for dummies" books. NOLO books usually have subjects by state as well and you should be able to find a book that will explain legal issues for renters and/or landlords by state. Read those and learn what YOUR rights are. The NOLO books are simple to read, you might even be able to find something out on their website. The library here in my town has so many god damn NOLO books, too so I know you should be able to find some.

I had a friend who was in a similar situation, he blamed his roommate and their dogs for destroying carpet, paint, just about everything in the apartment. The landlord came after them and he was the only one who could get a lawyer (and not for cheap) and in the end they had to settle with I think half of the asking money. I don't know the details of how it turned out but basically it seemed hard for him to tell the fucking people that it wasn't him it was his assholes roommates.

So: educate yourself, do some research, find out state laws for renters, document everything, write letters and keep copies for yourself to whoever you rent to regarding trying to get off the lease or whatever you decide to do.

Good luck, I would hate to be in that situation (thats why I never put my name on the lease!)

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#15 2010-01-11 13:52:26

Taint wrote:

I don't suppose you've considered simply abandoning everything and striking out on the road in a journey of introspection and self-discovery during which you'll meet individuals who, through their own struggles and experiences, will awaken you to the vast potential which exists within you, thereby helping you find peace and contentment with yourself and bringing you to a greater sense of self awareness?

Dammit Taint,

That will likely lead Bez here to Northern Cal. Are the roads not already jammed enough with seekers and seers.

Last edited by Johnny_Rotten (2010-01-11 13:54:05)

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#16 2010-01-11 16:02:08

Johnny_Rotten wrote:

Taint wrote:

I don't suppose you've considered simply abandoning everything and striking out on the road in a journey of introspection and self-discovery during which you'll meet individuals who, through their own struggles and experiences, will awaken you to the vast potential which exists within you, thereby helping you find peace and contentment with yourself and bringing you to a greater sense of self awareness?

Dammit Taint,

That will likely lead Bez here to Northern Cal. Are the roads not already jammed enough with seekers and seers.

Oh, and then they move up here to Portland.  Every other car has Cali or East Coast plates.  Go the FUCK AWAY.

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#17 2010-01-11 16:18:44

kim

Dmtdust wrote:

Johnny_Rotten wrote:

Taint wrote:

I don't suppose you've considered simply abandoning everything and striking out on the road in a journey of introspection and self-discovery during which you'll meet individuals who, through their own struggles and experiences, will awaken you to the vast potential which exists within you, thereby helping you find peace and contentment with yourself and bringing you to a greater sense of self awareness?

Dammit Taint,

That will likely lead Bez here to Northern Cal. Are the roads not already jammed enough with seekers and seers.

Oh, and then they move up here to Portland.  Every other car has Cali or East Coast plates.  Go the FUCK AWAY.

HEY! I'll be moving to OR soon ... just a few more months. But not portland area. I refuse to live in a large town/city. I don't like leaving my house and feeling like I am at Disneyland on a crowded day. Fuck, I am getting pissed off just thinking about it.

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#18 2010-01-12 08:55:09

Dmtdust wrote:

Oh, and then they move up here to Portland.  Every other car has Cali or East Coast plates.  Go the FUCK AWAY.

How do you think we feel in Florida during the cold months? You can't get anywhere and every other car is from Canada or some ice block on the Canadian border. RVs are blocking all the gas pumps, clogging the roads and don't even try to get a prescription filled at the drug store in under 2 hours.

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#19 2010-01-12 13:33:47

kim wrote:

Dmtdust wrote:

Johnny_Rotten wrote:


Dammit Taint,

That will likely lead Bez here to Northern Cal. Are the roads not already jammed enough with seekers and seers.

Oh, and then they move up here to Portland.  Every other car has Cali or East Coast plates.  Go the FUCK AWAY.

HEY! I'll be moving to OR soon ... just a few more months. But not portland area. I refuse to live in a large town/city. I don't like leaving my house and feeling like I am at Disneyland on a crowded day. Fuck, I am getting pissed off just thinking about it.

There are no large cities here.  If you want one, you have to move to Washington.  You can find mucho Sprawl up there.

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#20 2010-01-12 13:40:53

You know it is clouded over 9 months of the year here, rains or freezes at the damnedest times, the natives are unfriendly and we have worse unemployment than anywhere in the US, right?

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#21 2010-01-12 13:46:04

Dmtdust wrote:

You know it is clouded over 9 months of the year here, rains or freezes at the damnedest times, the natives are unfriendly and we have worse unemployment than anywhere in the US, right?

You guys still reroute I-5 Idaho?

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#22 2010-01-12 13:46:32

Dmtdust wrote:

You know it is clouded over 9 months of the year here, rains or freezes at the damnedest times, the natives are unfriendly and we have worse unemployment than anywhere in the US, right?

That's precisely why I've purchased several multi-acreage plots of land around Portland, so that I can build numerous residential towers and gated communities to house all the people who want to escape the sprawl in other areas. I'm sure they'll fit right in.

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#23 2010-01-12 14:55:31

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#24 2010-01-12 14:55:53

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#25 2010-01-12 14:56:09

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#26 2010-01-12 14:59:36

kim

Dmtdust wrote:

You know it is clouded over 9 months of the year here, rains or freezes at the damnedest times, the natives are unfriendly and we have worse unemployment than anywhere in the US, right?

Yes. I live in Southern California but I fucking hate the heat. I'm at the beach as much as possible, it is my job for Christ's sake, but the fucking crowded beaches are not for me. I've visited Oregon plenty of times when it was freezing fucking cold and raining at the beach. You throw on some rain boots and go outside and get over your car having mud on it. I never wash the thing anyway.

Oh, and my job that makes me $0 comes with me so that doesn't change anything really.

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#27 2010-01-12 15:04:01

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
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GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
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GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
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GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
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GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
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GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
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GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
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GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
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GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

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#28 2010-01-12 15:27:44

Roger baby! Where you been?

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#29 2010-01-12 16:19:01

Anyone know any firms hiring in Suriname?

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#30 2010-01-12 17:56:59

I think RT passed out with her finger on the G again.  Take that any way you want.

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#31 2010-01-12 18:42:33

The G Button~!  Maybe her vibrator short circuited.

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#32 2010-01-12 19:15:52

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
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SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
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SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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#33 2010-01-12 19:28:06

So THIS is where the G spot is!

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#34 2010-01-13 00:48:40

High Street is the Internet's G spot?

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#35 2010-01-13 01:10:06

Oh, god.  She's a squirter.

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#36 2010-01-16 08:27:16

Update: some dude wants to take over my lease. While I won't go into details now, I think things may work out in terms of a good "fuck you Friday."

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#37 2010-01-16 14:33:52

Congratulations!  I hope this works out for you.

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#38 2010-01-16 14:37:56

Take pictures!

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#39 2010-01-16 14:45:12

Take pictures, and invite all the tweakers in town to a gi-normous free drug party at the duplex, the day after you move out, in your ex-roomates name of course.

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