#1 2010-04-20 22:32:58
http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/mis/1701584027.html
You stuck my flash drive in your vagina - m4w - 25 (philadelphia)
Date: 2010-04-20, 3:04PM EDT
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You stuck my flash drive in your vagina. If you are reading this, you know who you are. I don’t think this is a fad sweeping the city, so this one’s for you.
We met at a Millcreek Tavern. You said you were from Lancaster. You were beautiful, you liked me. It was perfect. But then…
We went back to my apartment. We watched The Breakfast Club. You had never seen it before. We then ended up in my bed, as planned. And had sex, as planned.
You looked beautiful half covered in my sheets when I left to use the bathroom. When I came back, this is what I saw:
You standing naked at my computer. You with your hand on the keyboard, not typing. You grabbing the flash drive.
The flash drive pops out.
You look at it.
You squat a little bit.
You insert it into your vagina, like a tampon.
I am speechless.
You proceed to get dressed, say you have to go home, and leave. The number you gave me doesn’t work.
I am confused. I’d like to see you again. I’d like to see my flash drive again.
Your name is Rebecca. You have long blond hair.
Please get in touch. I am a very understanding person.
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#2 2010-04-20 23:17:26
I'm just hoping her cervical "os" supports USB 2.0.
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#3 2010-04-20 23:45:43
That girl is engaging in very risky behavior. Everyone knows that USB's are notorious carriers of sexually transmitted data.
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#4 2010-04-21 00:01:43
I think we've all been in this guy's position.
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#5 2010-04-21 00:13:42
A new marketing idea. We can have our middle aged women scent us up a big batch of these things and sell them to Japanese business men. Yep! That's right. We'll call them "Hot Flashes."
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#6 2010-04-21 00:20:31
I think the biggest clue is: "You were beautiful, you liked me." A "beautiful" girl acting friendly to a total stranger...
And then, the clincher: "We watched The Breakfast Club. You had never seen it before." Dowhatnow?
Item 1 + Item 2 = Bitch is crazy. Shoulda been obvious to any guy a good long time before that flash drive went up the cha-cha. No sympathy.
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#7 2010-04-21 00:22:37
Aaand while I was composing my joke, Banjo jumped in with a much better joke. You suck, Banjo.
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#8 2010-04-21 00:29:59
Sorry. I can't get the these ridiculous thoughts out of my head tonight. Too much Red Bull make a man crazy. It's so bad that I was trying (unsuccessfully) to come up with some kind of lesbian spin on your last post. You know, "Georgie Loves Cha-Cha."
OK, I'm going to bed.
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#9 2010-04-22 01:00:15
My vagina frequently reads floppy disks. :(
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#10 2010-04-22 05:05:46
If you are gonna steal data, I guess this is the way to do it with panache.
Oh and from my town:
http://frederick.craigslist.org/cas/1659335816.html
NSA Plasma Daddy - w4m (Frederick)
Date: 2010-03-24, 2:33PM EDT
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You, me, and a plasma cutter. No questions asked.
* Location: Frederick
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 1659335816
Last edited by Vaginator (2010-04-22 05:25:01)
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#11 2010-04-22 05:14:44
Fire wire is faster. But maybe that's not a good thing.
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