#1 2011-12-07 07:49:14
Now that all y'all get that I am very sick in the head (actually not clinically, several nutcrackers have said so), let me give you the evidence: I need some advice from you, please, because of all the groups of folks I have ever encountered, I have the most respect for this family. Y'all keep it as real as it gets. (And even though i keep writing y'all, I am not from the south by any means). I'm a longtime fan of the fam, and even tried posting some stuff on cruel, but a couple of you wore me out and I had to give up. I did not have the time, energy, or attention to maintain a straight up 24 argument with all the troops.
But desparate times call for desparate measures: I am considering a move to Denver, preferably metro, or Jefco (near red rocks would be sweet). But I have no idea how to market myself . . . on craigslist? Which I have never used. Or any other suggestions? I know that all of you will understand what I mean when I say that I am not cut from the same cloth as most folks, and ending up in the wrong position would be no good for anybody, not to mention it wouldn't last long. At all. I am fairly credentialed, at 31 I went to college for the first time, and 6 years later (yeah, 6 years) I had a J.D. and had passed the bar in a neighboring state.
Having "practiced" (in quotes because I only took smalll, relatively simple cases for people who I know/knew or those who came recommended by folks in the small town (don't rush to judgment, I live in the richest county in the nation, and I moved here after 5 years in the U.S.N. (yes I'm a vet if you're doing the math) to ski my sack off, which I did) where I now reside to whom the only answer could be "of course") on my own for 3 years now (yeah, I graduated from law school in 2008 which was supposed to be the beginning but ended up really sucking), I am starting to think that I might not have the guts to back up my education. I have enough trouble working for those people who I can sit down and say "look douchebag, here's how it is, here's what you're looking at, and I'll take your money if you insist . . ." to even think of starting to take every whackjob off the street that thinks they have a problem and I'm gonna be the guy to fix it. Of course, I realize that things might be different if the right position under the right mentor found me, but so far that has not happened. And notice I said might: I do have a problem treating the profession like a business, as I find myself drawn into and consumed by/with whatever it is I take on. Too emotionally invested. And everybody you deal with is at their absolute worst, ugly is the norm, and they are all expecting you to save them from, basically the really bad mistakes/decisions they have made for the last (howevermany) yearsAnd of all the openings I have applied for, maybe 10 so far, only one has even replied to me, and that was for a secretarial job that 10 licensed attorney's applied for. But enough of the sob story, I have decided to make a change and Denver it shall be (for too many reasons that are each too deep to get into here apart from saying I have spent a lot of time there and really love the place, and I have several very good friends/contacts there).
So here's my pleading (and keep in mind I absolutely do not have my heart set on practicing, but I would gladly take the Colorado bar if it meant the right position): having followed the recommended procedures for securing gainful employment with absolutely no success, please advise as to how to market myself in order to begin the next phase. I need some outside the box thinking here, and I have all the confidence in the world that all y'all are the right family to turn to for that.
Culturally aware (I have been a guest in well over 30 countries, more travelling with my anthropologist father than in the military), vet (worked in a foundry, went to desert storm twice), and I have extensive experience in bars/restauraunts (bartender at both high volume and upscale establishments), and the security industry (my first gig was cinderella/bullet boys/winger, and I have more or less worked that gig on and off since then).
Please advise. And have your way with me. Any comments/questions/concerns/advice/thoughts etc., are more than welcome.
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#2 2011-12-07 08:29:22
Wait what is that sound I hear? Could it, yes, be the ban hammer ringing out across the land?
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#3 2011-12-07 09:36:02
I heard there was this really good Craigslist opportunity on a farm in Ohio. Pack all your stuff because they have a place for you to live.
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#4 2011-12-07 10:08:59
I can only see two attorney niches with solid growth potential: Intellectual property and money laundering. If you know technology inside and out, go with IP. If not, with all of the "medical" MJ places in CO, how about hitting the books and coming up with some solid vehicles for growers to hide profits away from Uncle Sam? Take some side work in defense cases specializing in possession or trafficking. You could advertise in the local Alt newspaper. It would be easy money handling all of the cases for out of towners busted at the resorts.
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#5 2011-12-07 10:09:49
I hear that Brian Peppers is looking for a pen-pal. I'm not sure it pays though.
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#6 2011-12-07 10:27:55
What the fuck is that?
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#7 2011-12-07 12:45:10
Kathaksung is a lawyer looking for work in Colorado?!?
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#8 2011-12-07 13:07:47
You've got to be in the box before you can get out of it. Before getting in the box, write an address on the outside. Then tape it closed. Climb inside. Turn it to permanent press and tear of tags. The next step is self explanatory.
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#9 2011-12-07 15:58:29
But desparate times call for desparate measures: I can't argue with that at all.
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#10 2011-12-07 16:27:05
I can always use another attorney, and all the better if you're crazy and skeezy. Especially if you're proficient with the Chewbacca Defense...
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#11 2011-12-07 17:34:00
howcanthisbeagoodidea, I gave up reading your post about a sentence-and-a-half into the first paragraph. Instead, I want to post something about kitties. Now, I know that kitties have a thread of their own; indeed, I was one of the members who was quite adamant about having a special kitty thread and even now, four years later, I still take great pleasure in browsing the kitty thread. Why? Well, I'm glad you asked. Kitties, as everyone knows, are cuddly and furry and cute. They're playful, curious, and - come on, admit it - just a joy to have around. Of course, not all kitties are cuddly and furry and cute or even playful or curious or - I hate to admit it - a joy to have around. Yes, I think we can safely say that kitties are complex creatures, capable of eliciting equally complex reactions from us, the humans with whom they interact. Ah, kitties. What was I saying? Oh, yes. The kitty thread. Well, not the kitty thread per se because I had said originally I was going to post something about kitties and not the kitty thread but, in a way, the two are related, and quite closely, too. You see, the kitty thread is about kitties. Kitties and their foibles. Kitties and their cuteness. Kitties and other kitties. Kitties and the anthropomorphized identities we project onto them. Kitties and watermelons. In other words, kitties in all their myriad forms. One could say a great deal about kitties and I think it's safe to say a great deal has been said about kitties in the kitty thread. And why shouldn't we say a great deal about kitties. I mean, really now, who doesn't love kitties?
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#12 2011-12-07 17:35:33
Taint wrote:
howcanthisbeagoodidea, I gave up reading your post about a sentence-and-a-half into the first paragraph. Instead, I want to post something about kitties. Now, I know that kitties have a thread of their own; indeed, I was one of the members who was quite adamant about having a special kitty thread and even now, four years later, I still take great pleasure in browsing the kitty thread. Why? Well, I'm glad you asked. Kitties, as everyone knows, are cuddly and furry and cute. They're playful, curious, and - come on, admit it - just a joy to have around. Of course, not all kitties are cuddly and furry and cute or even playful or curious or - I hate to admit it - a joy to have around. Yes, I think we can safely say that kitties are complex creatures, capable of eliciting equally complex reactions from us, the humans with whom they interact. Ah, kitties. What was I saying? Oh, yes. The kitty thread. Well, not the kitty thread per se because I had said originally I was going to post something about kitties and not the kitty thread but, in a way, the two are related, and quite closely, too. You see, the kitty thread is about kitties. Kitties and their foibles. Kitties and their cuteness. Kitties and other kitties. Kitties and the anthropomorphized identities we project onto them. Kitties and watermelons. In other words, kitties in all their myriad forms. One could say a great deal about kitties and I think it's safe to say a great deal has been said about kitties in the kitty thread. And why shouldn't we say a great deal about kitties. I mean, really now, who doesn't love kitties?
Is this about me?
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#13 2011-12-07 17:41:12
Bigcat wrote:
Taint wrote:
blah, blah, blah
Is this about me?
Bigcat, isn't it all about you?
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#14 2011-12-07 17:41:54
Purrrrrrr
I thought it was about me but then I thought it wasn't about me. Sometimes things are about me and sometimes they are not. When things are about me then they are about me. I never really know if something is about me or not. I like sandwiches, that is about me. I don't know how to tell if it is about me or not. If it was about me then it is funny. If it wasn't about me then it is also funny. I like ice cream.
Last edited by Bigcat (2011-12-07 17:46:24)
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#15 2011-12-07 20:40:00
BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK!
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#16 2011-12-07 20:46:44
Bigcat wrote:
Purrrrrrr
I thought it was about me but then I thought it wasn't about me. Sometimes things are about me and sometimes they are not. When things are about me then they are about me. I never really know if something is about me or not. I like sandwiches, that is about me. I don't know how to tell if it is about me or not. If it was about me then it is funny. If it wasn't about me then it is also funny. I like ice cream.
So, everything is about you except the things that aren't, and they aren't in a way that's about you? Catnip is a food product, essentially.
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#17 2011-12-07 21:04:58
Roger_That wrote:
BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK!
Take it to the doggy thread.
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#18 2011-12-08 04:35:44
howcanthisbeagoodidea wrote:
I'm a longtime fan of the fam, and even tried posting some stuff on cruel, but a couple of you wore me out and I had to give up. I did not have the time, energy, or attention to maintain a straight up 24 argument with all the troops.
I see an immediate problem for an attorney right here.
Besides, this isn't cruel. We're kinder, gentler and don't give enough of a shit to out you or send you pizzas. That said, you really can't trust anything we tell you. Dude, we're more like lawyers than you are, and we despise lawyers, except for Fled and that hot black chick.
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#19 2011-12-08 05:28:13
Speaking of hot black chicks, I like kitties too. They don't bark, unless you make them breathe freon and listen to Corpse Eaters. May I have a sandwich now?
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#20 2011-12-08 09:12:30
Where is HKG when you need her?
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#21 2011-12-08 11:06:30
Roger_That wrote:
BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK! BARK BARK BARK!
Doggie style!
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#22 2011-12-08 20:48:47
I like it warm and wouldn't go near Colorado if you paid me. From what I hear, all the locust-people who ruined California are relocating there like the locusts they are and spreading their ruination.
I never knew a lawyer (I used to be a clerical cog in law offices) who didn't spend his/her entire life studying and practicing law with no real time left for a personal life, family etc. (They had them, of course, they just never spent any time with 'em.) If you don't like the idea of keeping up with the law and its most up-to-date perversions your entire working life, and then retiring with no one in your life but professional colleagues, then barristery is probably not for you.
If you are a law nerd, and there's nothing wrong with that--I still remember several of those old attorneys quite fondly--then Goober's advice seems very practical. Tech law will be a major matter well into the future, and medical MJ (and LOTS of other health care/medical issues) are going to run through the legal mill for years and years to come.
I don't like Denver or law, but I do love ice cream. I also love kitties very very much. My spouse has learned how to make mousse and has been practicing on me. There is some chocolate mousse in the fridge as I type this. Why the fuck am I sitting here typing when there is chocolate mousse out there in the fridge? I don't know. I think I should reassess my current situation.
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#23 2011-12-09 03:26:58
George Orr wrote:
I like it warm and wouldn't go near Colorado if you paid me. From what I hear, all the locust-people who ruined California are relocating there like the locusts they are and spreading their ruination.
I never knew a lawyer (I used to be a clerical cog in law offices) who didn't spend his/her entire life studying and practicing law with no real time left for a personal life, family etc. (They had them, of course, they just never spent any time with 'em.) If you don't like the idea of keeping up with the law and its most up-to-date perversions your entire working life, and then retiring with no one in your life but professional colleagues, then barristery is probably not for you.
If you are a law nerd, and there's nothing wrong with that--I still remember several of those old attorneys quite fondly--then Goober's advice seems very practical. Tech law will be a major matter well into the future, and medical MJ (and LOTS of other health care/medical issues) are going to run through the legal mill for years and years to come.
I don't like Denver or law, but I do love ice cream. I also love kitties very very much. My spouse has learned how to make mousse and has been practicing on me. There is some chocolate mousse in the fridge as I type this. Why the fuck am I sitting here typing when there is chocolate mousse out there in the fridge? I don't know. I think I should reassess my current situation.
Certainly don't go to Denver if you don't want to, but Colorado does have some very nice (and warm) places.
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#24 2011-12-09 09:18:24
George Orr wrote:
I don't like Denver or law, but I do love ice cream. I also love kitties very very much. My spouse has learned how to make mousse and has been practicing on me. There is some chocolate mousse in the fridge as I type this. Why the fuck am I sitting here typing when there is chocolate mousse out there in the fridge? I don't know. I think I should reassess my current situation.
I, too, love cats and kitties. I am currently experimenting with making frozen yogurt and ice cream.. Yesterday I made a lemon froyo. It was outstanding. This does not bode well for my gut however. At least the froyo has greek yogurt and lots of protein in it.
I also had an annual cookie bake with friends last weekend, and there was a ton of egg nog consumed. I heart egg nog with rum.
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#25 2011-12-09 19:38:26
I have one egg not per year (with rum) but I'm thinking about skipping the egg nog part this year and just curling up with the rum.
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#26 2011-12-09 19:47:30
George Orr wrote:
I have one egg not per year (with rum) but I'm thinking about skipping the egg nog part this year and just curling up with the rum.
While I was picking up cigarettes in Mexico City, I also grabbed some dangerously smooth tequila and a few bottles of rompope. Rompope - Mexican eggnog - is, potentially, even more dangerous than tequila.
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#27 2011-12-10 16:06:38
As a special treat for the holidays, I have stocked up on Trader Joe's licorice allsorts. They are the mega-yum.
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#28 2011-12-10 16:09:07
XregnaR wrote:
As a special treat for the holidays, I have stocked up on Trader Joe's licorice allsorts. They are the mega-yum.
Now, in addition to being terribly fond of kitties and rompope, I, too, am quite fond of licorice and I frequently purchase some great black licorice there, although the name escapes me. I wonder if they're the same thing?
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#29 2011-12-11 05:24:03
Oddly, I do not care for black licorice; But, I love ouzo. I think that is how I shall spend the Solstice this year - with my fattest, warmest kitty in my lap and a bottle of ouzo.
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#30 2011-12-11 08:26:24
Taint wrote:
George Orr wrote:
I have one egg not per year (with rum) but I'm thinking about skipping the egg nog part this year and just curling up with the rum.
While I was picking up cigarettes in Mexico City, I also grabbed some dangerously smooth tequila and a few bottles of rompope. Rompope - Mexican eggnog - is, potentially, even more dangerous than tequila.
Maybe it should go in the what are you drinking tonight thread, but what is your favorite tequila? I used to favor El Tesoro but have drifted away from tequila for some time, and a reintroduction seems to be in order. I'm looking for suggestions from all. Añejos only, please.
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#31 2011-12-11 16:19:39
I love black licorice! Unfortunately it sends my blood pressure through the roof, so I no longer indulge. The thought of having a stroke and spending my old age as a spastic drooling vegetable tended to by sadistic illegal turd worlders has a way of curbing my desire to indulge.
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#32 2011-12-11 20:57:36
Candied ginger. That's all I need on my desert island.
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#33 2011-12-11 21:07:06
GooberMcNutly wrote:
Candied ginger. That's all I need on my desert island.
I also love candied ginger! I take ginger root to reduce inflammation (I have respiratory allergies, Hashimoto’s Disease, and mild rheumatoid arthritis) and eat candied ginger whenever possible.
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#34 2011-12-12 03:11:26
I too am a candied ginger lover. Actually, I like gingers in general, but seriously I've been hooked on candied ginger since I was a tyke.
Fled, I'm not a big tequila drinker, but I was impressed with Azul. I suspect it's Reposado, but it's very smooth.
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#35 2011-12-12 06:44:35
Around this time of year I get a powerful hankering for a piping hot mug of those cheap-ass instant cider packets.
El Milagro makes some good tequila, but only if you buy the expensive stuff.
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#36 2011-12-12 09:57:19
Decadence wrote:
Oddly, I do not care for black licorice; But, I love ouzo. I think that is how I shall spend the Solstice this year - with my fattest, warmest kitty in my lap and a bottle of ouzo.
Oddly I don't care for ouzo, but I love black licorice.
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#37 2011-12-12 09:58:18
tojo2000 wrote:
Around this time of year I get a powerful hankering for a piping hot mug of those cheap-ass instant cider packets.
Mott's makes some really good ones. Caramel flavored is the best.
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#38 2011-12-12 17:57:30
Roger_That wrote:
tojo2000 wrote:
Around this time of year I get a powerful hankering for a piping hot mug of those cheap-ass instant cider packets.
Mott's makes some really good ones. Caramel flavored is the best.
I'm glad someone finally remembered the name of this thread.
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#39 2011-12-13 00:00:11
fnord wrote:
I take ginger root to reduce inflammation.
Does partner know about Ginger? And does "Ginger's root" really reduce inflammation?
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#40 2011-12-13 00:30:36
Banjo wrote:
fnord wrote:
I take ginger root to reduce inflammation.
Does partner know about Ginger? And does "Ginger's root" really reduce inflammation?
I would say it depends on how far you shove it in.
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#41 2011-12-13 15:07:58
I'm not into ginger men. Ginger women tend to be gorgeous, and if I were heterosexual I would be very interested in boning them. Ginger men on the other hand tend to be repulsive. I can only think of three ginger men I've met who were good looking. Frankly, gingers would die out if ginger women were as unappealing as ginger men.
Last edited by fnord (2011-12-13 15:08:30)
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#42 2011-12-14 03:37:57
fnord wrote:
I'm not into ginger men. Ginger women tend to be gorgeous, and if I were heterosexual I would be very interested in boning them. Ginger men on the other hand tend to be repulsive. I can only think of three ginger men I've met who were good looking. Frankly, gingers would die out if ginger women were as unappealing as ginger men.
Several women I work with have recently gone strawberry blonde. I'm ashamed of my Pavlovian response.
On a related note, recent genetic research indicates the recessive gene in chromosome 16 that modifies the MC1R is from Neanderthal lineage. Which proves us white folk will fuck anything with blonde or red hair.
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#43 2011-12-14 14:46:18
opsec wrote:
fnord wrote:
I'm not into ginger men. Ginger women tend to be gorgeous, and if I were heterosexual I would be very interested in boning them. Ginger men on the other hand tend to be repulsive. I can only think of three ginger men I've met who were good looking. Frankly, gingers would die out if ginger women were as unappealing as ginger men.
Several women I work with have recently gone strawberry blonde. I'm ashamed of my Pavlovian response.
On a related note, recent genetic research indicates the recessive gene in chromosome 16 that modifies the MC1R is from Neanderthal lineage. Which proves us white folk will fuck anything with blonde or red hair.
I prove that we will fuck anything with blond or red hair.
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#44 2011-12-14 17:10:13
opsec wrote:
fnord wrote:
I'm not into ginger men. Ginger women tend to be gorgeous, and if I were heterosexual I would be very interested in boning them. Ginger men on the other hand tend to be repulsive. I can only think of three ginger men I've met who were good looking. Frankly, gingers would die out if ginger women were as unappealing as ginger men.
Several women I work with have recently gone strawberry blonde. I'm ashamed of my Pavlovian response.
On a related note, recent genetic research indicates the recessive gene in chromosome 16 that modifies the MC1R is from Neanderthal lineage. Which proves us white folk will fuck anything with blonde or red hair.
It ain't just the white folk, our darker hued brethren enjoy the same compulsion.
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