#1 2008-05-23 20:57:08

State Bans Method Of Disposing Of Remains

MANCHESTER, N.H. -- State lawmakers have agreed to ban a method of disposing of human remains that many find unusual.

The process of resomation turns human remains into a liquid. Supporters said it's more environmentally friendly than cremation, which can release mercury. But lawmakers who reacted against what the process involves decided to ban it, even though it has been legal in the state for two years.

Resomation is done with a machine that uses hot water, high pressure and lye to dissolve a body. The liquid remains can be disposed of in the sewer system, and ash from the bones can be put in an urn.

"Very few have a stomach for the process because it is a little ghoulish," said Sen. Betsi DeVries, D-Manchester. (read more)

Mm, mm, grandma's almost done. Needs some sea salt and a sprig of rosemary!

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FAIL

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#2 2008-05-23 21:26:35

Attempting to retrofit our own population for this would be more trouble than outsourcing to Chinese kitchens and India.

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Hurble burble
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Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs

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#3 2008-05-23 21:28:51

pALEPHx wrote:

"Very few have a stomach for the process because it is a little ghoulish"

The mental capacity of our legislaturers scares me.

Scares me a lot.

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#4 2008-05-23 21:30:11

I don't get it.  How is that worse than sticking the body in a box and letting it just sit there until it desiccates or rots?

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#5 2008-05-23 21:39:14

2 words... Soylent Green.

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#6 2008-05-23 21:47:48

I知 interested in this because I知 running out of places to put dead bodies.  So if I placed a body in my bathtub with lots of lye without high pressure, how long would it take for the soft tissue to liquefy to a point where I could pull the plug and get rid of it?  Would I then use hydrochloric acid to dissolve the bones so they could go down the drain as well?  My biggest concern other than effectiveness would be possible damage to my plumbing.

Last edited by fnord (2008-05-23 21:49:45)

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#7 2008-05-23 21:48:25

Did somebody say soup?

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#8 2008-05-23 21:51:28

fnord wrote:

I知 interested in this because I知 running out of places to put dead bodies.  So if I placed a body in my bathtub with lots of lye without high pressure, how long would it take for the soft tissue to liquefy to a point where I could pull the plug and get rid of it?  Would I then use hydrochloric acid to dissolve the bones so they could go down the drain as well?  My biggest concern other than effectiveness would be possible damage to my plumbing.

I thought Jeffery Dahmer was dead....

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#9 2008-05-23 21:54:04

fnord wrote:

I知 interested in this because I知 running out of places to put dead bodies.  So if I placed a body in my bathtub with lots of lye without high pressure, how long would it take for the soft tissue to liquefy to a point where I could pull the plug and get rid of it?  Would I then use hydrochloric acid to dissolve the bones so they could go down the drain as well?  My biggest concern other than effectiveness would be possible damage to my plumbing.

What's wrong with using a woodchipper, lye, and a "manure pond"?  Weren't you in FFA?

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#10 2008-05-23 22:05:43

tits_matilda wrote:

fnord wrote:

I知 interested in this because I知 running out of places to put dead bodies.  So if I placed a body in my bathtub with lots of lye without high pressure, how long would it take for the soft tissue to liquefy to a point where I could pull the plug and get rid of it?  Would I then use hydrochloric acid to dissolve the bones so they could go down the drain as well?  My biggest concern other than effectiveness would be possible damage to my plumbing.

What's wrong with using a woodchipper, lye, and a "manure pond"?  Weren't you in FFA?

If I used a woodchipper, I could just put the resulting slurry in a composting bin.  The problem is that the neighbors would be pissed off if I used a woodchipper in the middle of the night.  My property isn稚 private enough to grind up a body outdoors in the middle of the day.

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#11 2008-05-23 22:06:59

Move along folks, no chopped up dead bodies to see here.

Last edited by fnord (2008-05-23 22:55:30)

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#12 2008-05-23 22:52:16

Lurker wrote:

I thought Jeffery Dahmer was dead....

People wind up dead because they pissed me off, not because I screwed up trying to create mindless love slaves.  There are no hearts in my refrigerator for afterglow snacking and my house is neat and clean with no nasty rotting bodies for d馗or.  I get rid of the bodies quickly and am always interested in efficient methods of getting rid of evidence.

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#13 2008-05-23 23:25:32

fnord wrote:

My biggest concern other than effectiveness would be possible damage to my plumbing.

You can always ask those nice men wearing hazmat suits now slowly approaching your front door.

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#14 2008-05-24 01:31:10

fnord wrote:

Would I then use hydrochloric acid to dissolve the bones so they could go down the drain as well?  My biggest concern other than effectiveness would be possible damage to my plumbing.

I think you would only have to worry if you had old partially corroded iron pipes. With modern ABS plastics the lye would actually make everything run free and happy. You are going to need some HCL that is a bit more concentrated then the 10% muriatic acid you get from building supply to get the job done. No matter how much of a hurry you are in, I do strongly reccomend though you avoid mixing the HCl with the lye solution.

Last edited by Johnny_Rotten (2008-05-24 01:32:37)

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#15 2008-05-24 02:01:04

You know, Fnord, if you're feeling at all creative, I suggest arranging the corpses in some sort of tableau, preferably in your basement or - if you live in a big, creepy old house - the attic. You might consider arranging them in a disarmingly comforting family scene seated around a dinner table, or you might think about setting them up to re-enact a scene from history, or perhaps an obscure opera. Really, the only limit is your imagination. Have fun and let those creative juices - but not any bodily fluids - flow!

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#16 2008-05-24 02:09:04

fnord wrote:

tits_matilda wrote:

fnord wrote:

I知 interested in this because I知 running out of places to put dead bodies.  So if I placed a body in my bathtub with lots of lye without high pressure, how long would it take for the soft tissue to liquefy to a point where I could pull the plug and get rid of it?  Would I then use hydrochloric acid to dissolve the bones so they could go down the drain as well?  My biggest concern other than effectiveness would be possible damage to my plumbing.

What's wrong with using a woodchipper, lye, and a "manure pond"?  Weren't you in FFA?

If I used a woodchipper, I could just put the resulting slurry in a composting bin.  The problem is that the neighbors would be pissed off if I used a woodchipper in the middle of the night.  My property isn稚 private enough to grind up a body outdoors in the middle of the day.

No, no, no, No, NO, NO!!!!  You're doing it all WRONG.  You don't put MEAT in a fuckin' compost pile unless you want to be overrun with RODENTS!!!  JESUS.  Manure pond is the right answer.  Don't ruin good compost with meat.  Besides, all the damn nitrogen would burn your plants.

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#17 2008-05-24 02:23:07

whiskytangofoxtrot wrote:

No, no, no, No, NO, NO!!!!  You're doing it all WRONG.  You don't put MEAT in a fuckin' compost pile unless you want to be overrun with RODENTS!!!  JESUS.  Manure pond is the right answer.  Don't ruin good compost with meat.  Besides, all the damn nitrogen would burn your plants.

And if you're only killing vegans, you've got totally organic bloodmeal.

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#18 2008-05-24 12:29:22

Taint wrote:

whiskytangofoxtrot wrote:

No, no, no, No, NO, NO!!!!  You're doing it all WRONG.  You don't put MEAT in a fuckin' compost pile unless you want to be overrun with RODENTS!!!  JESUS.  Manure pond is the right answer.  Don't ruin good compost with meat.  Besides, all the damn nitrogen would burn your plants.

And if you're only killing vegans, you've got totally organic bloodmeal.

Well, at least that would be good for your bulbs, but watch out for gophers.  Plant the bulbs in 6" chicken-wire cages.

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#19 2008-05-24 16:21:35

fnord wrote:

I get rid of the bodies quickly and am always interested in efficient methods of getting rid of evidence.

There's always hydrofluoric acid, for that get-it-done-in-a-hurry method. Most high molar acids would work, I imagine, the primary obstacles being procurement and, again, disposal of the saponified remains (that which melts people may also melt plumbing, etc). Not to mention the smells.

"Honey, why did you buy a gross of Glade scented candles at the CostCo?"
"I like fucking evergreens, okay? Stop asking questions and stay outta the guest bathroom."

Last edited by pALEPHx (2008-05-24 16:22:39)

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