The Redneck Scrapbook.

pALEPHx wrote:

I stumbled across this a couple of weeks ago in the "impulse buy" area of the Fry's. Add it to the list of things you might purchase when you're already under the influence. Jerky is a great source of protein. What, or who, it comes from is, however, a separate matter where only your conscience may guide.

http://www.xmere.com/xine/images/serial … _jerky.jpg
Redneck Comedy Tour has collateral damages.

I had no idea this man had grown much beyond hosting a Fox show about fifth graders. I'll bet he prays daily that they're never up against him. Nonetheless, here's some Jeffy Bits, dried up and chewy. They taste only mildly of Valvoline and Old Spice.

FIrst, let me say that I'm no fan. However, I was traveling through No Where, TX  and picked up a radio interview with one of his "Blue Collar" buddies. They mentioned that Jeff Foxworthy was the highest grossing comedian of all time. I don't know if it's true, but here's Forbe's ranking 2007:

#92 Jeff Foxworthy

Power Rank 92 
Pay $10 mil
Category: Comedians

Pay Rank: 78
Web Rank: 95
Press Rank: 93
TV/Radio Rank: 69  E-Score Rank* 15

Top Attributes
Funny, Talented


The senior statesman of the Blue Collar Comedy tour is enjoying a breakout year, due to the success of Fox's hit game show Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?' The show had the highest debut of any network in eight years. Foxworthy's merchandising empire, based on his 'You Might Be a Redneck If...' jokes, nets him $2.5 million a year. The 34-year-old commands some of the highest rates in the business, upwards of $150,000 per gig. His 11 CDs have sold 14 million discs total.



On a side note, I found this kind of funny:

...He worked for five years in mainframe maintenance at IBM (where his father also worked) before, where at the urging of co-workers, entering and winning the Great Southeastern Laugh-off at Atlanta's Punch Line comedy club in 1984.........

But would any of you actually EAT that jerky? What if it was made from Larry the Cable Guy?

pALEPHx wrote:

But would any of you actually EAT that jerky? What if it was made from Larry the Cable Guy?

I don't remember who, but somebody said that nobody actually goes to the store with the intention of buying beef jerky.

phoQ wrote:

Banjo wrote:

Forbe's ranking 2007:
#92 Jeff Foxworthy

Power Rank 92 
Pay $10 mil
Category: Comedians

Pay Rank: 78
Web Rank: 95
Press Rank: 93
TV/Radio Rank: 69  E-Score Rank* 15

Top Attributes
Funny, Talented

Does Forbe's make trading cards?  Or is this for an RPG?

I hope you mean rocket-propelled grenade.

jesusluvspegging wrote:

I believe he actually meant CCG.

Don’t make me create a Jeff Foxworthy card for Magic.  Actually I was thinking of a Blue Collar Comedy Tour LARP set in Harry Turtledove’s Southern Victory Universe with Call of Cthulhu and furries.

hedgewizard wrote:

phoQ wrote:

Don’t make me create a Jeff Foxworthy card for Magic.  Actually I was thinking of a Blue Collar Comedy Tour LARP set in Harry Turtledove’s Southern Victory Universe with Call of Cthulhu and furries.

http://c.imagehost.org/0506/rebelwolf.jpg

I never liked LARP, but I'd play that.  If I can be a shoggoth.

Several years ago, there was a vampire themed LARP group that played at my college's student center on alternate Saturdays.  Once, a friend of mine and I scrounged up a bunch of Pokemon cards (...from his collection.  Nerd.) and sat right in the middle of their play area playing Pokemon with Maximum Enthusiasm.

Lame, I know, but it was highly entertaining to see those fat gothy fuckers giving us the evil eye at every ", I choose YOU!"

Last edited by jesusluvspegging (2008-07-22 19:15:32)