#2 2008-09-17 21:56:20
Well, if I were still available, and I saw his mag, I'd be turned off. I'm far from a size queen, but he certainly isn't packing. Perhaps he should hook up with Mini-Pee here: https://cruelery.com/viewtopic.php?id=5717
Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs
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#3 2008-09-18 01:35:47
Feisty, did you get rid of Mr. A-hole? is this a new man? happiness ? do tell.
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#4 2008-09-19 01:11:08
Icangetyouatoe: Yes, got rid of Mr. A-hole. If I told you about the new man and the level of happiness I now have, it would make everyone sick and possibly cause a few divorces due to sheer disgust. All I can say is that I was as cynical as they come, and now I'm not.
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#5 2008-09-19 09:40:36
Well, they say that targeted demographics are the focus of new media. He has a mag about just himself and he will probably have exactly one subscriber. Perfect!
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#6 2008-09-19 18:57:34
feisty wrote:
Icangetyouatoe: Yes, got rid of Mr. A-hole. If I told you about the new man and the level of happiness I now have, it would make everyone sick and possibly cause a few divorces due to sheer disgust. All I can say is that I was as cynical as they come, and now I'm not.
Lemmie guess... you met him on High-Street!
(Good on ya, kid... have fun!)
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#7 2008-09-20 11:32:15
Nope. I met him when I was 2 weeks old...he's my childhood sweetheart. We still have letters from each other dated 1992... When we were 10 years old.
And go figure... he's intelligent, well adjusted, incredibly good looking, not a drug addict, and he's been carrying a torch for me for all these years. And he's hung like a horse! Woo hoo, ya'll, I'm finally getting laid!
Oh, and Sailor, when you saw the "I was as cynical as they come, and now I'm not," it's surprising you'd assume I met him on high-street. Wouldn't that make me MORE cynical?
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#8 2008-09-20 11:41:35
Slowly back away from the keyboard everyone.
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#9 2008-09-20 12:23:06
Jesus, feisty, I love Husband™ and wouldn't trade him for anything...but right at this moment, I wish I was you.
So, are you donating all your sex toys to Goodwill?
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#10 2008-09-22 14:11:04
No, I keep them in a nice bag, gathering dust in the back of my closet. Besides, with the interesting look of the Eroscillator, I became conerned that some little old lady would end up trying to use it in her kitchen somehow. Actually, I may rethink this... how funny would it be if a little old lady got my used sex toy and thought it was some wacky kitchen gadget?!
Thanks George. I know you've got quite a sickening love story between you and Husband (no idea how to do the tm thing...) too. But I am pretty fucking happy... and quite aware that this will be the part of my life that I'll wish to return to when things are shitty, so I'm getting my kicks in now.
Choad... yes, I was expecting some static from that. But hell, I've been happy for quite a few months now (working towards a year now) and have yet to share. I waited until I was accused of finding love on High Street... God knows I don't want to give anyone hope that true love could exist on THIS message board!
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#11 2008-09-22 14:32:55
Oh, look. I've stumbled into an episode of The View.
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#12 2008-09-22 14:49:00
pENIx is just jealous. I mean really, who can look at another man's hairy asshole and find love?
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#13 2008-09-22 15:02:19
Shut up, Elisabeth, or I'll get Joy to reach around Sherri and slap you.
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#14 2008-09-22 15:20:31
To commingle The View with Sue Johanson: on feisty's (or someone's) recommendation, I purchased an Eroscillator for my wife and she fell in love with it. Now she keeps it duct-taped to my hand.
I used it to rob a 7-11.
The thought of Sue Johanson using one has turned me into a monk. The image is of taking a dull chainsaw to a vat of butterscotch pudding.
Last edited by Fled (2008-09-22 15:21:16)
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#15 2008-09-22 15:22:47
Roger_That wrote:
pENIx is just jealous. I mean really, who can look at another man's hairy asshole and find love?
Don't say that RT. At least, not till you've seen my hairy asshole. Closer...closer...just a little bit closer...now stick out your tongue!
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#16 2008-09-22 15:45:49
WilberCuntLicker wrote:
Closer...closer...just a little bit closer...now stick out your tongue!
I am not RogerThatAssLicker.
Thanks tho.
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#17 2008-09-22 17:05:43
Fled wrote:
I purchased an Eroscillator for my wife...I used it to rob a 7-11.
You're a brave soul...and I don't mean for knocking over a convenience store. Most of the men I've known would revert to the age of three at the very thought of "competing" with a sex toy.
The thought of Sue Johanson using one has turned me into a monk. The image is of taking a dull chainsaw to a vat of butterscotch pudding.
Don't you put Sue down! I love that lady. I miss her TV show; it was everything that Dr. Ruth's show needed to be but wasn't.
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#18 2008-09-22 17:25:22
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#19 2008-09-22 17:50:53
George Orr wrote:
Fled wrote:
I purchased an Eroscillator for my wife...I used it to rob a 7-11.
You're a brave soul...and I don't mean for knocking over a convenience store. Most of the men I've known would revert to the age of three at the very thought of "competing" with a sex toy.
The thought of Sue Johanson using one has turned me into a monk. The image is of taking a dull chainsaw to a vat of butterscotch pudding.
Don't you put Sue down! I love that lady. I miss her TV show; it was everything that Dr. Ruth's show needed to be but wasn't.
My apologies. She actually is amusing, and I meant no offense. I am just a lttle over the top sometimes, but quite mild by Cruel standards (or lack thereof).
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#20 2008-09-22 18:24:18
feisty wrote:
Besides, with the interesting look of the Eroscillator, I became conerned that some little old lady would end up trying to use it in her kitchen somehow.
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#21 2008-09-22 22:58:52
Jesus, Zook, you're a genius! What the hell did you type into the search to find that?
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#22 2008-09-22 23:14:15
And which, as the clear expert in such things, do you recommend?
http://www.eroscillator.com/eroscillato … kages.aspx
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#23 2008-09-23 01:13:00
Um.... Yeah. I had a whole toybox when I got the eroscillator.... and the rest of it began gathering dust long before the eroscillator joined them.
It doesn't make you numb, it has attachments for both sexes, and it's the only fucking vibrator Dr. Ruth recommends. Enough said.
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#24 2008-09-23 02:14:30
Okay, so I had to look it up. Are you sure you aren't just voiding the warranty on your espresso machine?
http://www.eroscillator.com/eroscillato … kages.aspx
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#25 2008-09-23 08:52:43
feisty wrote:
Nope. I met him when I was 2 weeks old...he's my childhood sweetheart. We still have letters from each other dated 1992... When we were 10 years old.
And go figure... he's intelligent, well adjusted, incredibly good looking, not a drug addict, and he's been carrying a torch for me for all these years. And he's hung like a horse! Woo hoo, ya'll, I'm finally getting laid!
The last adequately sums up how my entire world felt after reading that.
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#26 2008-09-23 09:06:40
Jesus H. Christ on a stick that thing is expensive. Although I'm pretty sure I know someone that would buy one for me if I let him watch...
Time to make a phone call to a certain French/Jew.
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#27 2008-09-23 09:06:53
Anything that comes with an attachment called "French Legionnaire's Moustache" has to be sexy, right?
But for over $200, it ought to have a Snuggle and Call Your Mother-In-Law attachment.
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#28 2008-09-23 15:56:03
GooberMcNutly wrote:
Anything that comes with an attachment called "French Legionnaire's Moustache" has to be sexy, right?
But for over $200, it ought to have a Snuggle and Call Your Mother-In-Law attachment.
Hell, at that price it ought to have a cute little Indian boy to use it on you as well.
Last edited by whosasailorthen (2008-09-23 15:56:30)
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#29 2008-09-24 00:44:28
Scotty, Babe, you know anything between us would start and end badly. Especially given our histories.
I promise you, in my experience, the fantasy is much better than the truth. Remember my advice from our conversation... no point in staying unhappy, because if you know things are going to be shitty then you should get out. If you keep looking, you can find happyness... and happiness even. Geoge can speak to it... she's got Mr. George, who is the shit based on her posts.
Jesus, it's a heavy burden to think I pushed you to thoughts of suicide!
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#30 2008-09-24 00:46:02
Besides, I think Amber Amputee is still available!
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