#2 2012-05-27 07:19:55
Ultimately, I imagine that the poor, innocent lysergic-acid will be held to blame for this - Can-Not get a fucking break.
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#3 2012-05-27 11:25:20
Seems they are blaming in on the blow, not LSD.
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#4 2012-05-28 04:46:02
XregnaR wrote:
Seems they are blaming in on the blow, not LSD.
My miss-take. When I am stoned, I only tend to read the first and last two paragraphs.
I never quite "got" cocaine. It makes for a nice topping on a bong hit on occasion; But, not much else. I only have a bit on hand as people tend to leave it here. Is that one of the "side-effects" then? Leaving your powder be-hind? Be-Cause, when it starts occupying the cases of the compact discs which I would rather like to listen to, it be-comes a bit of an issue.
And, are we ignoring my Ubuntu query? Come on, People. The fact that I turned to you lot for help to begin with should be some indication of just how dire my situation is.
Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs
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#5 2012-05-28 06:15:50
Decadence wrote:
I never quite "got" cocaine. It makes for a nice topping on a bong hit on occasion; But, not much else. I only have a bit on hand as people tend to leave it here.
My first experience with cocaine involved the attempted homicide of a close friend. Thirty seconds after my virgin rail I came back to reality in the middle of a murder. I had my hands (hardened from carpentry) around the throat of an old friend, and I was doing my damnedest to squeeze the life out of him. My second amigo was trying to break the death lock, but with no success (he's a philosopher, not a phighter). I wasn't invited to a whole lot of coke parties after that. Later in life I had the up-close pleasure of watching my wife turn into a coke addict. In a hectic 10 months or so she went from happiness and prosperity to their antipodes, and permanently damaged her brain in the process. And yeah - every once in a while I find that someone has left me a half-pony, perhaps imagining that I'll sprinkle it on my porridge. I don't - I shit on it and flush. (Same with Meth - sorry Dec. Won't bore you with the meth tragedies, they're all the same anyways.)
Decadence wrote:
And, are we ignoring my Ubuntu query? Come on, People. The fact that I turned to you lot for help to begin with should be some indication of just how dire my situation is.
Dec, you give and you give, and then when you need a little help, what do you get? Nothing. Or worse - some bastard openly laughing at you. Hahaha.
Haha.
(I fear I'm not geek enough to help, but because of that I do know the appropriate recourse for one in your situ-ation. There is a wonderful community of Ubuntu nerds and coders who are only able to or-gasm when people like you share their problems with them. The response time is usually under an hour, and they generally know Ubuntu almost as well as you know the taste of your dog's pizzle. Often, if you're humble and allow them to sniff your ass a little, they will make you play a few tricks, then grant you a few lines of code that will make all your problems go away. Tell them WilberCuntLicker sent you. http://ubuntuforums.org/ )
Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs
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#6 2012-05-28 12:23:01
WilberCuntLicker wrote:
Dec, you give and you give, and then when you need a little help, what do you get? Nothing. Or worse - some bastard openly laughing at you. Hahaha.
That would have been a lot funnier had Choad not all-ready gotten a bit nasty with me in the other thread. Still, I am attempting to "laugh it through". Keep Calm, carry on, and all of that other empty defecation which we regurgitate for lack of any actual advice to offer future generations.
But, I will take a look at that one when I get more scotch. Most of my queries brought me to askubuntu.com which proved to be fucking worth-less.
Last edited by Decadence (2012-05-28 12:25:29)
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#7 2012-05-30 03:02:14
Some follow-up notes on the zombie incident:
The face eating zombie has been identified.
So has his victim.
The zombie menace is growing, the latest one threw his intestines at police in an attempt to spread the infection.
Last edited by fnord (2012-05-30 03:03:07)
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#9 2012-06-01 03:05:30
Holy Fuck. Time to clean the shotgun.
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#10 2012-06-01 03:22:03
Ronald Poppo, 65, is alive, but the bizarre flesh-eating attack left doctors with a literal puzzle in how to put his face back together.
Excellent close!
He then allegedly dropped most of the remains in a Dumpster behind a church in Joppatowne.
OK, here I just have to chortle and hope a certain user sees this.
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#11 2012-06-01 04:34:27
opsec wrote:
He then allegedly dropped most of the remains in a Dumpster behind a church in Joppatowne.
OK, here I just have to chortle and hope a certain user sees this.
Here's the local newscast from that user's area!
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#12 2012-06-01 12:52:01
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#13 2012-06-01 17:17:02
fnord wrote:
opsec wrote:
He then allegedly dropped most of the remains in a Dumpster behind a church in Joppatowne.
OK, here I just have to chortle and hope a certain user sees this.Here's the local newscast from that user's area!
Hello Woggah! Playmates?
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#14 2012-06-01 17:26:41
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#15 2012-06-03 13:27:56
Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs
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#16 2012-06-03 14:09:15
Decadence wrote:
XregnaR wrote:
Seems they are blaming in on the blow, not LSD.
My miss-take. When I am stoned, I only tend to read the first and last two paragraphs.
I never quite "got" cocaine. It makes for a nice topping on a bong hit on occasion; But, not much else. I only have a bit on hand as people tend to leave it here. Is that one of the "side-effects" then? Leaving your powder be-hind? Be-Cause, when it starts occupying the cases of the compact discs which I would rather like to listen to, it be-comes a bit of an issue.
And, are we ignoring my Ubuntu query? Come on, People. The fact that I turned to you lot for help to begin with should be some indication of just how dire my situation is.
My first rail came off of a strippers nipple. I have been a fan ever since. I have never devoured anyone's face. However, a snatch or two have had the platter licked clean.As long as you drink plenty of vodka, it is OK to eat stripper pussy- incase you were wondering.
Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs
Last edited by Bigcat (2012-06-03 15:05:22)
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#18 2012-06-04 05:14:08
He's lucky none of those people were armed. George Zimmerman would've nailed him.
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#19 2012-06-04 11:54:02
Oh Jeezus I Laughed at that! Thanks Fnordski!
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#21 2012-06-06 02:14:12
This whole thing may be an amusing statistical blip, but I suggest we keep an eye on it.
Carter was in the corner of the room with a knife in his hand, and he stood up, he yelled at police while stabbing himself all over his body. Officers noticed that his intestines were protruding from a wound in his abdomen, Heinemann said. Carter allegedly threw some of his skin and intestines at officers as they tried to enter the room, Heinemann said.
Edited for effect.
Last edited by opsec (2012-06-06 02:18:33)
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